Image: Meganne Forbes
“If we are creating ourselves all the time, then it is never too late to begin creating the bodies we want instead of the ones we mistakenly assume we are stuck with.”
In the past I have written about the importance of having a healthy body in order to speed up the opening of your third eye, and I have made some brief comments about my opposition to the “food like” substances that are consumed, but I want to now fully dive into this topic. I want to tell you about the changes I have made personally and the results I have seen because just giving out advice like any other blog is not really going to help. I think people want a personal account of a non-conventional spiritual path, and I hope I give that, but I also think people want to hear personal accounts of how mind, body and soul truly are connected. And, I have the proof to show you.
My journey started off with a clashing of my mind and soul, it was a psychological manifestation of a truly spiritual problem. I was around the age of 24 when I began to peek into the side of me that I had hidden as a child, the Seer who has one eye in this world and one eye in the next. I had suppressed this side of myself because I didn’t want to be the “freak”, I didn’t want to be the outcast, so I watered myself down, and changed my masks like one changes underwear.
It was a cycle of madness, of falsities, of lies.
I began to hate myself, to resent the person I saw when I looked into the mirror, and when the person who was looking at me could no longer remain silent, she made her presence known and showed me just how fragile my human mind was; she played off my fears, taunted me relentlessly, and sent my demons to hunt me down. I didn’t know at the time that she was a version of me, I thought I was under attack, or becoming possessed, it was not until after going through a mental break, and then coming off the medicine did I finally accept who I was. I had to lose everything in order to gain anything.
I started slowly on my path to finding my spiritual footing, and it was only because of my relentless seeking of everything did I find my answers; this thirst for knowledge is also how I came to my personal conclusion that it’s all relative, everything, all of it, connected.
Even now I take what I have picked up from each pantheon and make it my own, I adhere to no rules, no guidelines and I refuse to fit into any box, especially a box that I am expected to fit into.
After I had gained some ground in this area of myself, I knew my body was next. I have had chronic health issues for some time now, and as I am coming into my early 30’s I am facing my own mortality, call it an early mid-life crisis but I really just want to be the best version of myself that I can be, in every way possible.
The first task was to research my diseases, and figure out if they are hereditary, environmental, and basically find out as much as I possibly could. I was open with my doctor’s about my hesitance towards conventional medicine, and I was willing to find a happy medium. It took many adjustments, more setbacks than I can count, and a lot of trial and error, but I am finally reaping the benefits of my hard work, and dedication to all areas of Self.
Before I begin to tell the specifics of what I have done I need to say (for legal reasons, I don’t want to be sued) that I am not a medical professional (duh?!) and in no way am I saying that my methods will work for everyone, but they have worked for me.
I went full anti pharmaceutical, and I decided I was going to take vitamins I had researched. So, I was taking ginger root, and gingko balboa, I was taking a multi-vitamin and calcium, and magnesium, basically everything under the sun. It was not until I switched Doctors, and am now under the care of a Primary Care Doctor who is also an Internist, that I was told the damage vitamins can do.
I think it is disgusting that major pharmaceutical companies do so much harm, but the vitamins are just as dangerous. People think they are doing their bodies a favor, but they are potentially harming them. Also, I don’t think people understand the billions of dollars that is the vitamin supplement industry.
She told me that it was her belief my liver enzymes were so elevated because of the vitamins. She said while she understands my intent, she doesn’t know what is in those capsules. The thing is that vitamins are not FDA (Food and Drug Administration) regulated anymore and haven’t been since the late 90’s. The pills themselves are mostly fillers, and just recently there was a major recall on some.
Even after she told me this I wanted to still be all, “fuck the system” and I remained defiant for a bit, then it got so bad that I couldn’t take it anymore, I couldn’t continue on. I stopped all my vitamins, and decided to see what some specialists had to say. I started on a higher dose of a Levothyroxine, which is a thyroid medication and I also went back on Estradiol, which is a synthetic estrogen used in HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy). I gave the medicine time to work, and found out my liver enzymes had dropped significantly since the switch.
In the following weeks I found that my Vitamin D levels were a bit low, and needed to start taking a supplement. I take valerian root for sleep and anxiety, and an allergy medicine. I have taken note that with the more awakenings, or shifts in consciousness I have, the more sensitive I am to my environment, and the more “fresh and natural” I crave my body and life to be.
I have developed allergies to stitches, adhesive on tape and bandaids, eggs, wool, laundry detergent, some dyes, and several medications, including Amoxicillin which I have taken since I was a kid with no problems. It’s like suddenly I turned on myself.
Once my body started showing slight improvement from the inside, I began to work on the outside. I started yoga, and at first it kicked my ass, it is definitely not for the faint of heart. I am no expert, and don’t claim to be some Master Yogi, but I have pushed myself beyond my limits, and my body has responded in a positive way.
I also started Muay Thai, and have forced myself to sit and meditate. The chronic pain began to subside a little, I felt longer, and leaner. My Kundalini was less painful at night, and my ability to still function after a day of running around had gotten better; I was only down for one or two days, as opposed to four or five. I noticed my energy levels increasing, and my moods had become more controllable. I am now able to feel the shifts in my ocean, and can direct people away from the raging tides.
The last and probably most important key to my path has been the food. I was never a poor eater, and I have always been somewhat health conscious, but I wouldn’t call myself a good eater. I started this journey with making deals with myself. I would give myself rewards if I could last for a certain amount of time, and I did this until it was a habit.
First thing to go was fast food, and soda. I was never a big soda drinker but I did enjoy a mountain dew on nights I couldn’t sleep, and mornings I needed to stay awake. These items I cut out two years ago, but the rest of my food changes have happened in the last six months, really the last two.
My family is not rich, and we are often living paycheck to paycheck. I am fortunate enough to live at home with family, at first I was embarrassed to admit this, but now I embrace it. I love my family, and this is what works for us. I pay rent, and take care of the house which I think is a fair exchange. I also would like to point out that all my “other bills” and necessities are taken care of by me, but of course I do have my Mom to help if I get into trouble.
I am blessed, fortunate, and grateful, I never take any of this for granted.
With that said, food is expensive. We have a busy household that is often full with my sisters, their partners, and my nephew. My Mom looks at it like, if her house is full then her happy tank is full. I am not one who likes a full house, I much prefer my solitude, and quiet, but if Mom is happy, I’m happy.
Organic food is expensive, and so are the fresh fruits and vegetables necessary to live a truly healthy lifestyle. At first I was overwhelmed, and I thought I had to get everything at once. It was at least a few hundred dollars to get started on my healthier path but bit by bit, piece by piece it seemed to not be as damaging to my wallet. I was looking at juicing methods, and found myself trying to figure out what the difference was between a blender, and juicer. I didn’t know what seeds or nuts to eat, and not eat. I didn’t know what my body needed, or would respond positively to. I didn’t know anything, I just knew I had to start.
It was activia first. Yup, yogurt. Two of those bad boys a day, and your gut health will be in prime working condition. Our gut health is the center of our bodies, and if it is not working accordingly, the rest of our body will feel it. I also recently started taking a pro-biotic, they are expensive, and if you are going to take one you need to get Align, or the store brand of that (it must specifically say, “compare to align”) otherwise it is not going to be as effective, and you will not receive the full benefit. Also, to my vegans, they have a non-dairy option available.
I cut out red meat over a year ago, the vibrations lowered me too much, even with a blessing before preparing and before the meal. I am not against pork, but if I don’t have to eat it, I won’t. I like to have protein in my diet, and until I find a good substitute that works for me, it will have to do. Plus, I like meat but with my awareness of the treatment of our food animals I am becoming less of a fan. I am just a meat and potatoes kind of girl, what can I say. One day I will be able to say this in the past tense.
I do eat chicken, but it is organic, no antibiotic, hormone free, and it is never from the factory farming companies, it is always local. I have learned though that a blessing is mandatory if I am to eat meat, I don’t care how it sounds; it helps me. I learned along my way that the human body does not need dairy to maintain a healthy lifestyle, I also learned the horrific life of dairy cows and because of my own personal conviction I cut dairy milk out. I know, I know, yogurt is dairy, and hopefully in a couple months I can cut that, too.
I hate to be one of those hipsters who uses a splash of almond milk in her tea, but eh. I also hate that almond trees are now becoming this cash crop, and they are water hogs. Primarily grown in California. Hello, worst drought in California’s history mean anything to anyone?
I do still eat cheese because, um, cheese? I have cut down to only one slice on a sandwich every other day, or every two days. I think that making the conscious effort to live better will in essence make us feel better, making us want to do better.
The biggest change and benefit has been replacing breakfast with a smoothie. I was the kind of girl who liked eggs, then the allergy happened. So, I switched to bagels, and a yogurt. I am a pasta and bread person, so carbs are a comfort. Actually, I am a food person in general, haha. Seriously though, carbs are not the best thing to ever happen to us. In order for me to be able to continue to indulge in my cravings for “comfort food” I sacrificed breakfast, but in a way I didn’t sacrifice anything.
My smoothies are full of goodies and, it really isn’t THAT expensive. I was lucky and found a really good blender at Walmart (a company I now boycott) on clearance, then I read up online. I looked at people’s suggestions and took note. I use frozen fruit because it is more cost effective for me, and I like the texture it makes my smoothies. I will use fresh fruit if it is on sale, I do fit in fresh fruits and veggies in other meals throughout my day, or a snack. I fill the smoothie with kale and/or spinach depending on what is on sale, and what the produce looks like week to week. I add flaxseed meal, because I don’t like the actual seed in there, I also use chia seeds. I add a splash of 100% juice, and then fill the rest with water, and voila.
Delicious and nutritious.
With the simple replacement of breakfast I have lost a total now of 15 pounds. I am starting to sleep a little better the last few nights, and I feel it is because of these changes all coming together at once. It could also be the Magick I cast before sleep, either way I will continue to do both.
I have changed to all natural hygiene products, too. My skin and hair have never been better, and I have not felt this good in years. I am using essential oils for perfume now; I used to be obsessed with perfumes, but now I don’t want those chemicals (most animal tested) on my skin. I have incorporated tinctures into my routine, too.
With all of these little steps I have seen great progress in myself, I am not willing to blindly follow the medical world, but I am not against it anymore either. I seem to have found my happy medium between Magick, and science.
I am beginning to love the skin I’m in.