RANTINGS OF A MAD WITCH: Darkness is Not a Trend

Darkness

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“Yet, no matter how deeply I go down into myself, my God is dark, and like a webbing made of a hundred roots that drink in silence.”

Rainer Maria Rilke

I am going to say up front that I don’t believe this essay will be well received by everyone but, when are they ever?

If something I say here offends you then I urge and plead you to ask yourself, “why am I offended?”

Your reaction has everything to do with you, and nothing to do with me or my words on this screen.

As with most of my pieces, this has been bouncing around in my head for quite some time; I have had wonderful, deep conversations with friends about this ongoing trend I wish to address.

Having been a public figure (by that I mean writing/administrating pages and blogs on Social Media) for a little over 4 years now I am granted rare glimpses into people’s lives and Souls.

In this time, I have learned a lot, grown a lot, even died a few metaphorical deaths in there—it has been a thrill ride and initiation of sorts.

When I first started on Dear Wicked I used the admin handle ‘Noir’ (French word for the color black) and many people still call me that to this day; it is a spiritual name given to me and therefore very Sacred.

Being an admin (especially as NR continues to grow) affords me the pleasure of getting to know a lot of people that I otherwise wouldn’t cross paths with; in the beginning, I was met with a lot of backlash because I was “too dark” and “too harsh”—I get it, I have a strong presence and I don’t sugar coat anything, so people at first don’t like me.

Sometimes people never like me.

I am not here to be liked though; I am here to provoke thought.

I would/do talk about and/or post about topics and subject matter that made/make people uncomfortable and instead of standing in and owning their discomfort, they project their fears onto me.

The ban list on that page grew rather quickly as small insults from readers turned into them trying to sabotage my career, and use Magick against me. Ah, what fun.

It was a shit show when I first started, still is most days.

At that time, I started to use Social Media as a gauge for the current state of the world; seriously, if you are ever curious about the current energies that are in play, just pay attention to commentary and behavior on these Social platforms and you will notice the trends I do.

Our community was plagued with what we have all come to call fluff bunnies; I don’t intentionally mean this as a term of disrespect and I honestly believe all Witches have their place and purpose but the imagery I wish to convey is aptly described and formed when I use the term “fluff bunny”. So, chill, k?

I was personally bombarded by these morality police, light worker, new-age, threefold believers who wanted to fill me with love and light while beating me into submission.

I come from darkness and was forged by flames, I will submit to no one.

Fire 2

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As for love and light, they have their purpose and place in the grand scheme of things but it is not with me, or within me.

My love, and my light come from a place of darkness. Read that line again.

In the last 2 years or so many of these same Witches have “come to the dark side” and how fucking ironic is that?

How ironic is it to see people who would outright deny their darkness now talk about embracing their Shadow and doing Shadow work?

How hypocritical that they are talking about these topics without ever having faced their Shadow?

I am just going to say this:

DARKNESS IS NOT A TREND.

DARKNESS IS NOT A TREND.

DARKNESS IS NOT A TREND.

I understand that people evolve and paths change, and that is not what I am talking about here; I am talking about the people within our community who could not handle being called out on their judgmental light bullshit, so they switched sides and now want to claim the dark.

Witches, Occultists, Mystics—hell, people in general should strive for duality BUT there are some of us who lean towards one side over the other and *THAT IS OKAY*.

It’s okay to carry light and dark; it’s okay to carry just darkness; it’s okay to carry just light;

It is not okay to pretend to be something you are not because you don’t want to face the ridicule anymore; with truth comes ridicule, and the truer you are to yourself, the more authentic your life becomes, the more you will be outcast.

I am ridiculed for being too dark, not being balanced, and pretty much just for breathing most days but I stand in my truth, I burn in my truth, I stand on top of this crumbling world and shout my truth for all to hear.

No one can ever say that I have not been dedicated and true to myself, my path, or my Craft.

Lotus

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That is the key here: we must be true to our Craft and to ourselves otherwise everything we do is a lie and Magick is no place for liars.

If you claim the dark out of fear, or wanting to “be cool” the darkness in turn will claim you and, that is something you never want to experience.

Let people talk, let people stare, let people misunderstand you, let them draw their conclusions, and make their judgments; their words should have no effect on you.

And remember, to thy own self be true.

 

 

 

For what it’s worth…

Horns

Image: “Daughters of the Underworld”, 2014.© Nona Limmen

“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.”

Jiddu Krishnamurti


I am not known for being an overly friendly person, I blame it on my gift of sight. Once the façade is gone, people aren’t as exciting to interact with. The reality though is that the past has taught me a lot about the things that can happen when I allow people to get too close, or too comfortable. For a long time I thought that this was a defense mechanism, but I know now it is to keep me sane. I already walk a very fine line, a line that has complete Madness on one side, and Enlightenment on the other. I don’t keep many in my circle but I love this community like family. We can relate so easily to each other because we face the same hurdles. I believe that a lot of us look “crazy” because there are many who really don’t know the truth, who refuse to see the truth, who would never believe the truth even if it slapped them in the face. The masses are threatened by anything different, but especially something as taboo as the Occult. This goes equally for Right Hand Path, Left Hand Path, Satanist’s, Atheist’s, Witches, Pagan’s, Wiccan’s and every belief system that is not “the big three”; Christianity, Judaism, and Islam.

We are judged, and ridiculed by society, and for these reasons those of us who choose to walk ‘alternative’ paths should stick together. We need to remember that at one point we knew nothing, and we also could have been viewed as naïve when it came to our personal Philosophy. Shall we not forget how fucking terrifying it is to break away from a thought process that everything in your ‘reality’ has told you to follow. I look around and see cliques of people claiming to be “this” or “that” and trying to start wars with other groups. I see people cracking jokes about where on the spectrum others fall. I see people not only using, but teaching violent rituals to serve Lucifer, Set, Baphomet, Baal, and others, thinking that this brutality is how you get the attention of a Fallen, Daemon, God, etc. They require us to be true to Self, the rest is based upon the individual. We do not need to add more stereotypes by teaching rituals that require blood sacrifice to appease these Fallen. Firstly, because blood, semen, vaginal secretions and urine should be used by an experienced practitioner only. Secondly, not everyone will be comfortable using bodily fluids, and some will not be comfortable performing a ritual at all.  That IS ok, it is ok to not practice as another does. We must follow our own path, and for the record, blood, etc. does not make them more or less willing to work with you; Bodily fluids just add potency.

We have strayed from our path, and before we can begin to fight the outside world, we must fix the problems within our own.

I think everyone needs to first and foremost have respect for their fellow human being, and we cannot go around lashing out “just because” or because they do not agree with us. Newsflash, a lot of people don’t agree with us, but we must always give respect. I could be getting screamed at by a Christian, Atheist, or even a fellow Witch but I will always maintain a level of composure because I will never give my enemy what they want; a reaction from me. The minute we stoop to the level of our opponent, or someone who is trying to engage in a debate, is the moment we hand the win over to that team. We cannot continue to react in the way that “they” think we will. Mind your manners.

Another issue I want to discuss is this whole “bursting someone’s bubble” thing. I understand that because we are on the path to Enlightenment that we sometimes feel the need, or impulse to spread truth. Why do you think I do what I do? However, we cannot go around destroying another’s illusions/delusions. That is not fair, and often it is unwarranted. We do not need to “prove” ourselves to anyone except ourselves. We must focus on the ones who are new to the path, and those who have an itch, or yearn to come over to our side. We must be willing to accept others, and help them thrive. We cannot take away free will, and like I have said before, we cannot force our beliefs on another. That makes us no better than Christians preaching to us about “Hell” and “eternally burning in fire”. We must allow people to naturally evolve and by choice come to this side.

Lastly, we need to stop judging those within our community. There are many who practice their Magick in a way that I never would, but if it works for them, more power to them. We are all individuals, and we have to be more accepting to those who do not walk the Left Hand Path. We also need to stop being so judgemental to those on a similar path to us. I think that comparing ourselves to another will surely be our own destruction. We each have a role to play, and they are all equally important. We cannot afford egos when we are facing a massive change, paradigm shift on the horizon.

I don’t know what made me write this, I started off wanting to write about something else entirely. There is a reason for everything, I suppose, so there is a reason for this, too. I don’t want to come off as trying to give others rules to live by, and I do not want to sound “preachy”. But, being who I am, I cannot help but notice the fatal flaws within our own community. I know that weaknesses in time of war can be used against us, and I do not want our inability to stand with those who are different than us be the reason we fail.

We are seekers of Truth, practitioners of the Old Ways and keepers of Knowledge. I do not care what title you wear, or whom you do or not worship. I only care that when the battle starts our soldiers are ready.