LESSONS FROM OUR WOMB: Menstruation, Menopause and Magick

Bath

image source

“Something inside her was made of moonflowers.”

Rune Lazuli

Women are amazing creatures (all people are but this is for my ladies).

Our bodies can bring life into being—that’s beyond profound.

Our lips cast spells of honey, healing words and hexes when you threaten what is ours; our hips are built to birth babies; our breasts are meant to feed our young and a comforting landing zone for their tired, sad heads when the world tries to tear them down; we are everything nature is.

Creative. Destructive. Powerful. Weak. Compassionate. Cruel. Beautiful. Ugly. Forgiving. Merciless.

We are a mix of wonderful paradoxes and Divine chaos.

For me, Witches epitomize what it means to be a Woman; in our society being a Woman automatically makes you inferior in many people’s eyes but when you are a Witch, you take back a lot of your power without even knowing it.

You see, the world hates strong Women.

So, yeah, we are more likely to be targeted by the weak and ignorant minded on a smaller scale but in the grand scheme we are generally left alone because there is no force as strong as a Woman who has stepped into her power. Many will choose to avoid us altogether rather than face us head on.

Of course, I am not suggesting that the *only* strong Women to exist are Witches, but I am saying that Women who are Witches are the strongest I know.

Women and the Moon have been connected since the beginning of time; it was the Moon who helped the first Women map their menses, and their Magick.

We are created to be cyclical; just like the ocean has an ebb and flow, so do we and just like the ocean, it is the Moon who rules ours.

Blood Moon

image source

When I first started on the path I kind of just jumped right in and for me the Feminine aspect of myself, my Magick, and my Craft was not of huge importance; I just wanted knowledge.

When I began to evolve on my path I reached a point where I had to open the door to my Femininity, my Womanly essence; I had to find the root of my pain, and the root of my power so that I could tap into both; use one to heal the other.

So, I went searching.

If you have ever looked-for articles, books, or blogs written about Witches, the Moon and Menses, you will see that the search results are endless; literally, it’s an endless list of search results.

Sounds great, right?

Well, not really.

All these articles talked about us connecting to our Wombs, how important our menstrual blood is, and how we should map our PMS with our Magick, and emotions, which is all true.

But, what about those of us Women who are Witches that don’t have a womb?

The ones who don’t bleed?

Where are we represented, not even that but where are we to look for answers about our bodies and how they relate to and reflect Mother back upon us when everything we read is telling us we are not fully a Woman because we have a womb space, instead of an actual womb?

I had a full hysterectomy as many of you know—I write about it all the time because I want people to understand my story.

There are Sisters who are Transgender, and thus biologically they cannot bleed. I believe that Transgender Women have a womb space that is like a collective consciousness; I have a womb space that is a void of sorts, a place where my womb once stood, residual power that can still be tapped into; then there are Women fully in-tact with their womb in place.

Womb or not, we are all powerful creatures.

We are all deserving of our Magick.

We are all beautiful definitions of the Divine Feminine.

There are Women who are post-menopausal, which usually happens in our Crone years but can in a lot of cases happen sooner—known as Early Onset, or Premature Menopause.

Drawing from Crone power and wisdom, along with feeling a disconnect from my womb were huge hurdles for me to overcome.

I eventually accepted that my Magick took a turn towards the Crone’s wisdom and grayness once I hit menopause because that is what I needed at that time, which helps validate my “we are cyclical” theory.

It also led me to the lesson that I believe we can tap into Maiden, Mother and Crone energy throughout our entire lives; for me they are not just age ranges, they are feelings, thoughts, emotions, learning experiences, etc.

What life requires from us is what energy we will and should draw from.

Menstruation has long been thought of as gross, taboo and something that shouldn’t be discussed; as a Women’s Rights Activist, Feminist and someone who promotes Wild Woman Spirituality, it makes my heart sing that we are beginning to break down the barriers of misunderstanding and blood that have divided us for too long.

Our bleeding is necessary for life.

That is the furthest from “gross” I can think of.

Red Rose

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But, while we are breaking down barriers and progressively moving forward it’s important to understand that our community is not one size fits all; we do not all fit into one box and there should be representations, and voices that everyone can relate to.

I know what it means to bleed, have it taken away, not bleed, and then be thrust into menopause, at 27 mind you.

The entire experience has made me a stronger person, a better Witch and a more compassionate Woman.

We are amazing, cyclical creatures that are guided by the Moon; our menses and madness follow it’s phases.

Blessed Are the Witches.

SUCCUBUS: The Truth You Don’t Want to Hear

Anna Gorin

Image: Anna Gorin

“To have her here in bed with me, breathing on me, her hair in my mouth—I count that something of a miracle.”

Henry Miller

This blog initially started out as a rant, a bit of a defensive article about the demonization of Succubi; I was hoping, am hoping, to shed some light on the wide range of uses we have outside of “Stealing sexual energy”.

Because this is such an important blog, and message, I have teamed up with my fellow Succubus Leslie Chepstow.

It is time the truth was set free, and it’s time the truth sets you free.

When people hear the word Succubus they think of a whore who steal Men’s sexual energy, or they conjure images of a scary She-Daemon who does the same.

Succubi FEED ON sexual energy, we do not always steal it. There is such a thing as consensual feeding—it comes in the form of a consensual, open minded partner.

Shocking, right? (Insert Sarcasm)

It seems like everyone in our community lately wants to act like Lilith is some goddamn trend, like she is the new “it girl” of the Craft but yet NOBODY wants to admit what she is: A ruthless, coldhearted, monster with an insatiable appetite. She is also Mothering, sexual liberation personified, and the epitome of a free Woman but please let’s not water her down like all the other Women in history—she has earned the fear she instills in others.

Respect that.

Leslie writes, The Lilith in me stands in the flames of truth, unashamed of who I am, stripped and naked of pretense. I will give you a chance to understand me but if you are so arrogant to think I am beneath you, I’m un-evolved, not equal–the Lilith in me says fuck you.

Everything is not all buttercups and rainbows. Sometimes its horror and abomination, rage without remorse. When Mother calls to me I tremble with anticipation. In fact, the synestheste in me looks forward to the color of unleashed rage splashed in my mind.

Ironically, it’s the darkest part of me that will do my highest calling.

We are multifaceted Succubi.

I care; I really, really do care about people, animals and entities. That is why I use most of the energy in positive ways but at the same time I absolutely do not give a single fuck about bad people, bad entities or negative energy in general.

I face my darkest self every. time. I go. to feed. 

It’s not glamorous.

These entities are hideous and full of negative energy. 

They have done some horrible shit and need to be stopped.

(One method is to seduce them, bind them and flay the energy from them. Then leave an empty space like a good dominatrix.)

Regardless, the energy eventually must be transmuted.

Which is why, contrary to popular belief, Succubi have something to offer this world.

We can take something utterly negative and horrific and turn it into something good through the power of Kundalini. Lilith teaches us the power of the Serpent and its ability to rule over all Beasts.

That’s why I take *pleasure* in stealing the energy from those negative beings; humans or otherwise.

These days for both Leslie and myself, it is “otherwise”. We both feed from entities—in diverse ways but we both feed from non-humans. That is what we call evolution; that is how you can be an Evolved Succubus. You would think people in the Magickal community understood that.

Now, let’s address some misconceptions about us and clear them up once and for all.

  1. Succubi crave power over Men: There is this common thought that we all think “men suck, I want to get even.” No men don’t suck—the Patriarchy sucks.
  2. I want to be a Succubi because it will automatically empower me; I will be like Lilith: For this reason, the glamorization of Lilith is dangerous; she is not here to hold our hand or grant us wishes. She requires, being a Succubus in general requires, grueling Shadow Work full of blood, sweat and tears. THAT’S the stuff that matters, the stuff that actually empowers people. Society has put too much emphasis on sex being a source of power and control that we miss everything else sexual energy can teach us.
  3. The so called Magickally Evolved, Sex Goddess, <insert any title> Women who are disgusted by Succubi:

Let’s delve into this deeper.

These women assume Succubi are unevolved, unethical, energy sucking whores.

But,

These are also the same Women who constantly write about embracing the Dark Goddesses and literally PRAISE Lilith. Do they not KNOW who Lilith is?!

For example, I posted an article the other day from the Fb page WITCH—“8 Signs that you are a Magickally and Evolved Succubus”.

Almost immediately a Woman who claims to be a “Goddess of Sacred Sex” came through and commented: “A Succubus is someone who steals other people’s sexual energy. Yes, very Magickal and Evolved.”

These are the same Women who would never judge a group of people as a whole, they judge people as individuals–on merit and not just assume shit.

So, why, whyyyy are these so called enlightened, evolved “Sacred Sex Goddesses” assuming such negative stuff about Succubi? It doesn’t fit their MO in other areas so why Succubi?

I think there is a deeper thing going on.

I truly believe they are hiding some sexual hang-up, some deep fear hidden in a sugar coat of assumption.

Why else would they treat Succubi different than any and every other group of people?

Throughout time Succubi have ONLY been written about negatively, sound familiar?!

Witches, anyone?

Let’s talk about the double standard that we see, too.

Do you ever see male Vampyrs talked or written about negatively (Sanguine or Incubi)?

Oh no, plenty of people know of, write about and love male Vampyrs but us female Vamps, we are “whores who have no ethics and are notorious man stealers”

The hate directed at us is ***always*** from Women; the disinformation spread is always from Women.

It’s like the Patriarchy seeped into their brain or something.

Women tear us down, lump us together and throw us all in the same goddamn fire. We are excluded from so much within our very own Witch community because people refuse to understand.

So, we either suffer and keep our truth to ourselves (Why hide aspects of who we are? We are proud to be this way!) or we suffer the deafening solitude.

The solitude is great and all but, feeling like I am starring in Mean Girls most days fucking sucks.

How do we feed?

We take energy and change it into a luminous pure energy during the cleaning fires of orgasm and then we use this pristine energy to heal people/places/things/animals.

Leslie writes, When I worked in this plane I would find a willing human energy donor and then use the energy to heal horses. Now that I’ve completed my goal in this plane, I’ve moved on to another plane; I, like Jaclyn, feed from negative entities. I use the same method to clean the energy but depending on the entity the energy can be immense. The excess energy is given to Mother, for the “war” and I believe she sends it out to her daughters that need healing. And I keep some of the energy for myself. People like Jaclyn and myself had to become Succubi. We expend a massive amount of energy because of our level of Magick.

The point of this blog is to show people that we are not all monsters, of course there are some in the bunch who abuse their power but that is with ANY GROUP OF PEOPLE.

Aspects of us are Monstrous but Maternal; we want freedom, and liberation for all beings.

The real issue is that the world is terrified of strong Women; especially strong Women who are sexually free, and empowered.

We stand proudly in our fire of truth, in our power of sex, and do the jobs that require real sacrifice and Shadow Work while others skim the surface.

This is who Mother created us to be.

This is who we are:

Not superior, just refusing to be treated inferior.

HOW TO SUCK D*CK: A Guide for the Awakened Mind

julia-randall

Image: Julia Randall

“There is nothing more feminine than a blowjob. You naked on your knees. Your guy with his hand resting on the back of your head. A really good blowjob confirms some primal nostalgia. It puts the world in balance.”

Chloe Thurlow

I am stepping way, way outside of my comfort zone as a writer and person to put this piece together; this is not usually my topic of choice and many of you who know me are probably, literally, thinking “Jac, what the fuck are you doing?”

Well, folks, you see I feel like someone needs to address this subject and since my two greatest talents were once well known as “rolling blunts and sucking dick” maybe I am qualified to speak on the matter.

“Did she just say sucking dick?”

Yes, yes I did.

Giving Head.

Fellatio.

Blowjobs.

Whatever you want to call it, that is EXACTLY what I am talking about.

I shared an article the other day from one of my favorite Facebook pages called My Tiny Secrets; the article was about How to Eat Pussy—if interested, click here.

As expected it got so much attention and even more interaction but, one comment stood out; it suggested that someone come up with an article on How to Give a Guy Head.

At first my inner Feminist (the comment was made by a man) was all huffy and puffy that he had the audacity to even ask but then I stopped and thought, what makes his request different than the article I just shared?

Then I asked the biggest question of all: have I ever even seen such an article?

Followed by:

Why doesn’t anyone talk about sucking dick, in a non-demeaning type of way?

Why are Feminists scared to say they love sucking dick—why is anyone scared to say it?

Why is it seen as something only “Sluts or freaks” do and are proud of?

Why is it viewed as a reward for remembering an anniversary, or “good behavior” instead of a regular, frequent, healthy part of a sexual relationship?

And the questions went on and on…

I mean…I am celibate and have not had a dick in my face in 3 years but I will still say, proudly, that I love sucking dick, and I am quite good at it. Full disclosure, I do not have a gag reflex and was taught some tricks of the trade by one of my favorite gays; still, sucking dick, just like eating pussy, is an art form and it’s okay to not know what you’re doing.

Furthermore, it’s okay if you don’t want to do it.

This leads me to my first tip (pun totally intended, ha)

YOU HAVE TO WANT TO SUCK IT: As with all forms of intimacy, from personal conversations, touch, straight down to sexual acts, there must be a want, a desire behind the action or else there is no purpose in doing it in the first place. We all know that everything is energy but, sexual energy is the life force; it’s strong, powerful, potent, and should be respected. It’s totally cool if oral sex is not your thing, some people really *don’t* like it; if that is the case for you then you need to be open and honest with your partner. You should never do something simply because you believe it will please another or keep them in your life; seek out someone who accepts you as you are. To sum it up, if you don’t want to suck it (or eat pussy) then don’t! Sex is most pleasurable when both partners are wholly present and involved in what is going on.

SIZE DOESN’T MATTER: A dick is a dick, and of course inches may determine how far it can go in your mouth, it does not determine how enjoyable the sex will be. This is a huge point to make because for many Women that I speak to, they equate a big dick with a good lay and well, I can speak from experience that this is not always the case. I think there is far too much pressure put on men to have a decent sized dick, and honestly, it’s ridiculous. Sex is a huge part of a relationship but it is not all of it, and if you are judging your partner on the size of their dick then you need to re-evaluate yourself.

GRAB THAT COCONUT OIL: This is something that I learned after finding out that I have an autoimmune disease called Sjogren’s, which causes dry mouth and dry eyes, among other symptoms.

Fact is, you need a wet mouth to suck dick, so when in need, improvise. Coconut oil not only tastes good, it adds an amazing texture; it also becomes creamy and white the more you lick, suck and flick so visually it’s sloppy, and kinky. Using a lube like coconut oil also helps create that sucking and gushing sound that so many men (and women) like. Even if you do not have dry mouth like I experience at times, I highly suggest adding coconut oil during your next head session. This works for pussy eating, too!

FIND HIS G-SPOT:  As many people know the male G-spot is located inside the rectum but it can also be stimulated from the outside. The internal method involves inserting a finger, plug, dildo or another object of choice into the rectum, slowly, and with some kind of lubrication (coconut oil is preferred, but saliva can work, too) and gently stimulating the perineum; this is located near the prostate.

The area can be stimulated externally by taking your first two fingers and gently massaging and applying slight pressure to the perineum (this is the area between the testicles and anus and is a highly erogenous zone). You want to stimulate the G-spot while also stimulating the shaft and/or balls (in laymen’s terms, you want to stimulate while you suck)

Start slowly, your man will tell you if it’s too much or not enough. Be warned, the orgasm created from such stimulation will be the most intense orgasm he has ever had.

DON’T LET THE FORESKIN SCARE YOU: In American culture it is fairly common for men to be circumcised so when a woman runs across a dick that is uncircumcised she thinks it’s gross, unclean, and I have even heard women make jokes about choking on the foreskin; as if that is funny, or can’t be overcome. I mean, maybe, just maybe, you’re sucking too hard…

Do your research about foreskin and circumcision before forming an opinion, and for that very reason I will supply a link at the bottom.

If properly cleaned (regular, mild soap and water with a little pulling back of the skin) you are good to go.

I am not going to get started on how unethical I believe circumcision to be, and in reality it is NO DIFFERENT than the Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) everyone cries out about (I am against this as well, duh). My point is that an uncircumcised penis is natural and should be celebrated just as much as a penis that has been cut.

We need to support our men in all of their variations and sizes, just as we expect them to accept us.

So suck it, flick it, lick it, tease it, and enjoy it!

Resources for further learning:

http://www.cirp.org/library/sex_function/

F*CKING: Screw Your Definition of Sacred

Matthew Gaynor

Image: Matthew Gaynor

“Sex is kicking death in the ass while singing.”

Charles Bukowski

It seems since the page has taken a different route lately that I am being met with a lot of resistance, and back lash from my readership; both males and females alike have been up in arms over the sexual content and discussions happening regularly now.

Quite frankly, I’m shocked.

I am not new to the blogging/writing world, or being an Admin and I am most certainly not new to the concept that people don’t agree with everything I post but, to see people so upset over sex, and sexual articles on an Occult page is baffling.

I thought, overall, that we were a pretty open-minded community to all kinds of taboo topics, lifestyles, and desires; even though we need to do some serious work within the community about accepting our own.

Have I underestimated my fellow Witches and Occultists, or have I just been blessed with meeting some glorious douchebags?

I wrote a little rant on the page recently, and a blog a few weeks ago that touched on this topic and I thought for sure it would die down but, it’s only gotten worse.

One comment that was made twice has been ruminating:

“The Admin of this page is promoting empty Spiritualism by promoting Whoredom. There is no such thing as a Sacred Whore.”

First of all, I was offended.

I don’t “promote” anything; I tell my story from my perspective with a splash of practical advice and interesting articles I find along the way.

I have stated MANY times that I don’t want people to think like me, therefore what do I promote?

Whatever. I let that part go but, empty Spiritualism?

There is nothing empty about me,

Or my page.

Let’s make one thing clear: Consensual Sex is always Sacred.

Yup, even drunken one night stands; the boring, the passionate, the sloppy, the kinky, the sweaty and everything in between—it’s ALL Sacred.

You can give it pretty names like “making love” or “physical union” or you can simply say fucking–either way, it all originates from the same place, and it truly is all Sacred.

Let us not forget the emotional part though; different types of sex do require different emotional responses and sex is an amazing outlet to express oneself.

I debated with one guy who commented and his rebuttal at one point was, “by commercializing sex (ie. Sex work, prostitution, etc.) and engaging in casual sexual activity that it took away the sanctity of it all.”

I couldn’t disagree more.

Sidenote: sex work is work and I fully support sex worker’s rights.

There are many facets and layers to sex, sexual acts and sexual desires.

Sex is not “one size fits all”.

As stated in posts before if there is suppression of emotional, physical or Spiritual trauma that is causing the sexual promiscuity or perversion, if you will, then the issue needs to be addressed so that you can heal and move on.

But, if you happen to just really like sex, if you happen to just like multiple partners, or kink, or orgies, or anything else that your heart desires simply because it feels good and it is what YOU WANT TO DO, then more power to you!

To be inclusive, if you aren’t interested in sex and are a-sexual, or gray ace, more power to you, too!

Sex and sexual identity are complex issues.

Back to my point, the thought that I’m promoting “empty spiritualism” is crazy…

True spirituality is found in living, breathing, and becoming our most authentic self; one could say that Nirvana could be reached by this very practice.

Our truest, most authentic self is the pathway to our higher self which is the gateway to ascension.

Maybe my authentic self is being celibate for now or forever, maybe yours is one partner, maybe someone else’s is fucking the whole neighborhood; we each experience sex differently and no one way is the right way.

Our sexual Self is our primal nature embodied; it’s one of the rawest, truest forms of expression (this part is key which is why I said it twice).

As for commercializing sex as said in the comment, I don’t see a problem with it. People have exchanged sexual favors for money/goods/status since the beginning of recorded human history.

Let me point out that I am not including the horrific practice of sex trafficking (obviously) nor am I suggesting that there is no such a thing as forced prostitution; something that is very dangerous for the worker.

My keywords here are: safe and consensual.

I am talking about the fact that there *is* such a thing as safe, consensual sex work (regardless if it is illegal or considered immoral by some standards).

And, I personally do not think that money being involved takes away from the act being Sacred.

Since when does Sacred mean unity with one other person under specific circumstances, candles lit all around, and chanting some Ancient hymns?

Why can’t someone’s Sacred be wild, passionate fucking and/or multiple partners?

We all get off on different things, and I think that just like sex, Sacred is subjective.

When we start to force yet another stereotype of how we “should be” we lose sight of who we are.

We all judge people to one degree or another it’s human nature but, we really need to get over ourselves and stop judging people for their sexual desires and what they choose to do as a consenting adult.

Judging someone based upon the type of sex they have is self-righteous, sanctimonious, and rooted in superiority; not to mention it’s none of our goddamn business.

To sum it up, sex is energy, Sacred energy at that; energy may change but it always remains.

Certain situations make the energy more potent than others but it’s Sacred, even when it makes you uncomfortable and challenges your moral compass.

If you are projecting your morality on to others, something tells me your true motives need to be brought to light and questioned.

“Morality is simply the attitude we adopt towards people we personally dislike.”

Oscar Wilde

 

PUSSY POWER: The Art of Yoni Healing

Liu

Image: Liu Yuanshou

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”

Rumi

I have always been as open and honest in my writing as I can be, I have also been open and honest when it comes to telling my stories; both mundane and Magick, and the point in the road where the two intersect.

One of the main pieces of my story is my hysterectomy, not only did the surgery change my Magick, it changed my body, my mind and essentially my Soul. Going in to the whole ordeal I had no idea, exactly, what I was getting myself in to and how badly it would hurt me in the end.

As my Gramma always told me, “Hurt is the best teacher but it can be your demise, too. Choose carefully.”

It took me a long time to truly understand what she meant.

We can choose to hold on to the hurt and let it consume us, make us bitter and cynical or we can choose to feel the hurt, heal the hurt, and allow ourselves to grow from the hurt.

Gramma also said, “it rhymes with dirt for a reason.”

She was truly the wisest Woman I knew, and she, too, had a hysterectomy; both my Grandmas, in fact, along with my Aunts, and my Mother, too.

The pain of the empty womb space runs deep in my family line; a pain I carry so deeply, so intensely, and so sacredly inside.

This post may be about me but it is written for you.

I am writing this to all the Women who have sent me messages with questions asking how did I deal with this trauma; that’s what is, a trauma.

This is to the Women who, like me, felt their Divine Feminine was taken from them.

This is to the Women who are told by society that we are defined by our organs, and how many children we bear.

This is to the Women who are taking their Power back.

This is to the Women whose Pussy Power knows no bounds.

I was nudged to finally write this article after my SiStar, Nuit Moore shared a piece of writing I urge you all to read.

Let’s first talk about me and my Pussy so that you know our backstory, then I am going to give you some tips that completely changed my sexual world and how I exist in it.

I am by no means a Woman’s health expert, nor am I a Yoni expert, I am simply sharing my story in hopes that it can help my fellow Wombn. See what I did there?

I am my Sister and my Sister is me.

Before I get into my story let me warn you and say that there may be TRIGGERS in this blog for some of you. The story DOES CONTAIN (very little) TALK OF SEXUAL ABUSE AND RAPE. I want this article to empower you not send you into a spiral.

I will give you the abbreviated version so that I can get right to the good stuff and let you know how to set your Pussy Power free!

I was sexually abused as a child, and raped twice in my early twenties, I lost my virginity at 18; late among my friends who were active since they were 13-14. I think the late sexual activity had to do with my INFJ traits, but I did masturbate from a very young age. I was always in touch with the sexual side of myself (no pun intended, ha), and at times it most certainly was devious.

Until the age of 26 I was extremely promiscuous and as mentioned in previous blogs it’s because I was suppressing my Magick and acting out; sex became my form of self-harm.

It was at this time that my third irregular pap smear came back and Planned Parenthood (who I routinely saw for my Gynecological health) told me that they had helped as much as they could but I needed to be seen by a Specialist.

At this point I had no clue how important my Pussy was, I had no clue how important my Moon Blood was; Magick until this point came natural, and it was not in the form of being connected to the Goddess or my Feminine side for that matter. In hindsight I was extremely disassociated from my Pussy; even with all the masturbating and fucking, her and I were just not on the same wavelength.

After going through endless tests including but not limited to a Colposcopy, 2 LEEP procedures, removal of the lymph nodes in my Mesenteric region, continuous cycle birth control methods (in theory to stop the bleeding) and countless other tests and tricks, I was left with no choice but to opt for a hysterectomy.

So, as I turned 27, this was going to be my new reality.

At first my Doctor and I had decided to take out the Uterus and Cervix, leaving in the Fallopian Tubes, and Ovaries; he went in and scraped out all the Endometrium tissue, too. (Pretty severe Endometriosis)

I was officially diagnosed with Cervical Cancer, Uterine fibroid (about the size of a grapefruit), Ovarian cysts, and as mentioned, Endometriosis.

I jokingly said to my Doctor many times, the Gods really just didn’t want me to have children; a joke then, not so funny now.

It was about 3 weeks’ post-surgery when I was rushed back into the operating room to remove the Tubes and Ovaries that my body was rejecting; if I had waited any longer I would have risked septicemia because my body considered these organs foreign. Now, this meant going through surgically induced Menopause—as if natural Menopause isn’t bad enough.

I healed, physically at least, and tried to carry on with my reckless lifestyle; it didn’t last long. I was simply uninterested in sex, or at least the sex I was having, and well, my Pussy was different, I was different….life was different.

In October of 2013 I stopped having sex, and have not had sex since. I do however have an extremely active sex life, and I did manage to heal my Pussy and take my power back. I managed to do all of this by myself with some guidance and encouragement from my Sisters along the way.

You are probably thinking, all right, all right, so how do I heal my pussy?!

Funny you should ask…

  1. ACTIVATE YOUR ROOT AND SACRAL CHAKRAS! – Your Root and Sacral Chakras must start spinning again before any sexual revolution within yourself can take place. Often, activating these Chakras requires activating the Heart Chakra, too. When we are faced with severe trauma, emotional or physical, the first Chakra to go is the Heart. To help myself I invested in a Rose Quartz Yoni massage wand. It is two-fold: pleasure and healing. The Rose Quartz promotes self-love, calmness, healing and cleansing. I cannot say enough about massage wands and Yoni eggs. They both are based upon similar principles—healing the Yoni with sexual and gemstone energy. P.s Doing Kegels is also a good idea because it not only keeps the muscle tight, and the pelvic wall strong, it keeps us in tune with our Pussy. Some crystals that can help with sexual energy and particularly the Root and Sacral Chakras for such work are Garnet, Jet, Carnelian, Red Calcite, Red Tigers Eye, and Red Jasper. For the Heart Chakra I would suggest Rose Quartz, Ruby in Fuchsite, Peridot, Green Kyanite, and Green Fluorite.
  1. ACTIVATE YOUR KUNDALINI ENERGY! – This sounds much more complicated than it really is. The Kundalini is a Feminine energy that sits at the base of the spine; everyone has this energy within them, both Men and Women. When fully activated we are not only brought to a higher level of consciousness and awareness, we are brought to new sexual heights as well. The word itself comes from Sanskrit and means “coiled like a snake”. The activation of this Sacred energy must be done gently and with specific intention or you risk causing yourself severe back pain, and essentially, pissing off your Serpent. She can be brought to life, and coaxed to rise up by doing Kundalini yoga, but if yoga isn’t your thing, then the next best tip is to dance; focusing on your lower region. The type of dance you need to do should be freeform, without thought and extremely sweaty and sexual; you want to roll and rock your hips, you want to rub your hands on your body, and breasts, allow yourself to be taken over by the music and ecstasy. Some crystals to help activate the Kundalini are, Jet, Moldavite, Seraphinite and Serpentine. I would also suggest Rudraksha beads and/or some Shiva Lingam stones, as they are associated with Shiva and he not only carries the Serpent energy with him, he is the God of Yoga.
  1. MASTURBATE! MASTURBATE! MASTURBATE! – This is an essential part of overall health and too often people are scared to talk about it, let alone actually do it! Participating in regular masturbation sessions is good for the mind and body, but can also be used to help manifest desires, and cleanse the Root and Sacral Chakras. We cannot expect to be sexually fulfilled by another unless our own hand can do it to ourselves. It is when we become one with our Pussy (or Penis) that we can and will truly experience sex in all its glory. Touch yourself, find out where your sweet spots are, and in the process you may find some you didn’t even know you had. Try out different textures, too! This may be a little kinky for some, for me it seems like child’s play; feathers, latex, leather, rope, and silk are all enticing to our senses and can add to the experience. I also cannot recommend coconut oil enough. I hate to be *THAT* girl but it seriously is the best thing to hit the vagina since, well, forever. Make sure if you are going to use it for lube (with a partner or by yourself) that you invest in high quality, certified organic, cold pressed, virgin coconut oil. It sounds way more intimidating than it is, I promise. I found my HUGE tub for $9. The best part about this is the fact that it melts upon contact, and that in and of itself is a fucking turn on. It is instant delicious wetness, and usually a few degrees cooler than our body. It’s also much healthier for the body than the lubes sold OTC. Also, it is great when giving or receiving head. Try it, I bet neither you or your partner complain.
  1. MEDITATE! MEDITATE! MEDITATE! – This sounds like it is common sense for many on the spiritual path but it isn’t, at least not the kind of mediation where the Yoni is the focus. Most people when they think of meditation they only think about the mind, and focusing their intentions there, but we can and should be mediating with our Pussy as the focus, too. To do this you want to lay flat on your back on your yoga mat, towel, or whatever surface you choose. You want to bring the soles of your feet together, forming a diamond shape with your legs. Place one hand on your Pussy, and one hand on your Sacral Chakra (belly button region). Say out loud, “I release the pain of my past, I heal my Pussy, I take back the power of my Pussy, I am one with my Pussy, She is mine and mine alone.” Repeat until you actually believe it. After you have done this for a while move your hand from the Sacral Chakra and place it on your Heart. Say out loud, while your other hand is still on your Pussy, “I am open and receiving to self-love and love of another. I am worthy of this love. I am present here in this moment. I accept my Feminine Power. I take the Power back from those who tried to steal it from me.” Again, repeat until you believe it. This meditation can be personalized, and the Mantras changed but it should be practiced regularly; even if you are in a relationship, or if you are celibate like me, you want to make sure you still have a relationship with your Pussy.

It has now been 5 years since my hysterectomy and I am still relearning my body and what pleases me; it has not been easy but it has been one of the best, most rewarding journeys on my path. I draw from the Power of the Crone now and the Dark Goddesses have taken me under their wing.

I also draw from the Power of the Mother—and that has been a HUGE lesson for me. Just because I cannot have children, just because I never wanted children does not mean I am not a Mother, it does not mean I cannot be Mothering or that I am unworthy of such a task; it simply means my path to fulfilling the Mother role is different.

I am a Mother to all the misfits who feel like they have no place to go, who feel forgotten and cast aside by society.

I am a Mother to the people who wear their scars, both physical and metaphorical like battle wounds.

I am a Mother to those who hear the cry of the Wild and it stirs something deep within them.

I am a Mother to all the Women who will walk this earth after me because it is in my footsteps that they can find solace.

I am a Mother to all those who came before me, it’s in these words their voices can be heard because these words are the echoes of thousands.

To see my other blogs on Sacred Sex:

https://thenephilimrising.com/2015/12/04/masturbation-and-magick-how-i-healed-myself-through-touch/

https://thenephilimrising.com/2015/12/07/celibacy-and-magick-the-dynamic-duo-of-sacred-sex/

https://thenephilimrising.com/2015/10/02/sacred-sex-bdsm/

SLUT: I Will Not Be Shamed Into Submission

Mira Nedyalkova

Image: Mira Nedyalkova

“The Western Sexual Revolution sucks. It has not worked well enough for Women.”

Naomi Wolf

Last night before bed I posted a quote about sluts, and it caused quite the stir. I want to talk about the reaction, and the quote itself along with my opinion on the matter; why it IS relevant on NR for reasons other than it’s my page and I can post what I want.

First thing’s first, here’s the quote:

“A slut is someone, usually a woman, who’s stepped outside of the very narrow lane that good girls are supposed to stay within. Sluts are loud. We’re messy. We don’t behave. In fact, the original definition of “slut” meant “untidy woman.” But since we live in a world that relies on women to be tidy in all ways, to be quiet and obedient and agreeable and available (but never aggressive), those of us who color outside of the lines get called sluts. And that word is meant to keep us in line.” ― Jaclyn Friedman

In case you have not noticed let me clarify that on my page I intentionally post thought provoking images, quotes, links, etc. I post things that will make you uncomfortable, and question your perspective of the world. I have done this since the beginning and will continue to do so regardless of who tries to dull my shine.

If you don’t agree with something on the page, then you don’t HAVE to comment; you don’t HAVE to form an opinion and put it online for the world to see. I have spoken about this so many times that I am starting to annoy myself.

Commenting ignorant, misogynistic opinions is a choice, and a poor choice at that.

Someone asked why the post was necessary. I replied to his comment and asked “Why is this comment necessary?”

His rebuttal, “Just like this post, it isn’t.”

*deep sigh*

The post is relevant because I am a Woman, and I was promiscuous at one point in my life. I was called a slut, and shamed for my sexual freedom. Having sat in the solitude of celibacy for the past 2 ½ years I can say with certainty that I would do it all over again, and I don’t regret a single thing.

I do not regret a single one-night stand, I do not regret one orgasm, or blow job I gave in my life; I also do not regret the nectar of the Gods I allowed them to sip in return. I regret none of it, and the moment I do is the moment I hand over my power to another.

In that moment, I hand over the power to define myself.  I’ll be damned if I allow that to happen again.

I posted the quote because I thought it was interesting and well, it’s fucking true! I posted the quote because I felt like it. I posted the quote because the picture is strong with deep rooted symbolism. I posted the quote because far too many Women shy away from their sexuality for the very fear of being called a slut, or worse; the fear of being judged in general is often cause for most Women, even today, to repress their pleasure, fantasies, and desires. Collectively we seem to be getting better but we have a long way to go.

Have you ever noticed when a Woman does not “act accordingly” she is called not only a bitch, but a slut? Why is it that slut is the go to insult?

What is it about that word that makes it cut so damn deep?

Generally speaking, Men get away with far more in the sexual arena than Women do.

When a Man is fucking everything he sees, he’s not just a man, he’s known as “the man” by his peers.

Now, I am not shaming a Man’s sexual freedom or the choice to have as many sexual partners as he wishes; I am shaming the double standard.

If a Woman chooses her sexual liberation in form of multiple partners she is automatically a slut. She gets called “dirty” and “loose”.

I hate to burst the bubble of people who hold this mentality but what do you think we are supposed to do with a part of our body that is strategically placed on our genitals and happens to have 8,000 nerve endings? (Reference: Clitoris)

Sit on it, and look pretty?

Cut it off in some barbaric tradition, then sew our Sacred Yoni shut?

To be fair, I think male circumcision is just as bad as female circumcision (FGM). Though the conditions in which they are done seem to be far more traumatic, dangerous and blatantly unsanitary for the young girls who experience this as part of “becoming a Woman”.

I am the first to admit that in many cases promiscuity is because of an underlying emotional stresser/trigger/event that has not been dealt with; in some cases, the person (in this context, a Woman) may not even be aware of the issue(s).

There are, however, many instances where Women just like to have sex. Why does something have to be wrong with her? Why does she have to be “searching for love but afraid of pain”? (One of the comments I deleted this morning).

Why does she have to be anything other than a human being having and enjoying sex? Why are we judging her? Why do we feel the need to judge her? Why do we feel that we have the power, or authority to judge her in the first place?

Sex is amazing, and how another chooses to have it literally does not affect you whatsoever. Read that line twice, three times for good measure.

Who someone chooses to sleep with, how many people they choose to sleep with and the style of sex they choose to partake in does not hinder your quality of life in the least. Stop wasting your energy judging other people and use that energy instead to look in the mirror and see why you feel the fucking need to be judgmental in the first place; because clearly this narrow minded way of thinking has some deep rooted issues within.

You shouldn’t point your finger in judgment of another with dirty hands. Didn’t anyone teach you that?

Sex should be consensual, safe, fun, dirty, free, expressive, gentle and rough simultaneously. Sex should be all this and more, so much more.

Sex should never be shamed, but rather celebrated.

Celibacy and Magick: The Dynamic Duo of Sacred Sex

Benjamin Goss

Image: Benjamin Goss

“Sex is the sacred song of the soul; sex is the sanctuary of Self…

Sex is the supreme sacrament, wherein the body and blood are offered up to the soul. The elements thereof must be worthy, their consecration absolute…

The sexual nature of a man is his most intense expression of himself; his subconsciousness endeavors thereby to inform his consciousness of his Will… It is supremely sacred to him, and to interfere with its expression, or try to edit it, is an abominable crime.”

Aleister Crowley

This is a follow-up of sorts to my Masturbation and Magick post, which did really, really well and I am super happy because that piece took a lot of courage for me to put out there in the world. This is an equally important piece for me, I find that the more personal I get with my audience the more personal realizations I have; it’s a win/win, really.

Before I get into the main part of this post which is how to practice Sex Magick alone, I want to clarify a few things. I get hit with a lot of backlash for being celibate, I have had people denounce my sexuality, and a few gentlemen even said I was not really a Luciferian if I was not engaging in sexual activity. “I am not allowing my primal, carnal side to surface”, they said.

The question needs to be asked, under whose authority is anyone to denounce my sexuality, or my status as a Luciferian? Luciferianism is about the individual, and not all individuals engage regularly in sexual activity, some don’t engage at all (A-sexual, virgins, or those who choose celibacy) for a variety of reasons. That does not make them less than, especially if they are only being true to themselves. Anyone who denounces another’s Philosophy in general is a dick; one who does so based off of sex is simply pathetic, and lacks the understanding of the core principles of Luciferianism.

Also, why is there this huge misconception that the only way to be sexual, sexually empowered, and sexually free is to have a sexual partner? In my opinion, from my own experience, this is so ass backwards it’s not even funny; I feel more empowered now, then I ever did having sex, and no I am not saying this will be the case for everyone, nor that one cannot become empowered by sex, the irony is one can only become empowered by the RIGHT sex. Random hook-ups are not going to help you on your path to enlightenment when looking at the bigger picture.

Above all else, sex is sacred and should be treated as such, in an oversexualized culture it is hard to understand this in most cases until it is too late. When I found out about the sacredness of sex, I was already bogged down by the sexual demons I had attach to me while out on my romps.

Sex Magick can be used for just about any, and everything. When one thinks of Sex Magick there are usually two images that pop into their head, Aleister Crowley, and orgies but it is so much more than that. I practice by myself, I practice forms of it with particular deities I work with, and I believe that everyone should be proficient handling their own Life Force, and bodily fluids before they go and start performing ritual with another.

This form of Magick includes the use of Semen, Vaginal Secretions, Menstrual Blood (some consider Urine part of this, too, though I do not) or the Orgasm itself in Magickal workings, castings, rituals, and rites. You can use a personal incantation, or one borrowed, there are many books on the topic with rituals given; I personally always write my own spells.

I use Sexual energy to heal my body and Soul, and I do this by absorbing the orgasm back into myself. You see, the moment of orgasm is like two stars colliding, it packs a powerful punch of potent energy, and that energy is usually wasted because we are so caught up in the moment that we don’t channel it, or we freely and without thought give it to our partner; which if you are practicing with someone is usually the idea, but I am referring to cases where it is just sex.

There is no fancy ritual that I do, and often find myself lying in bed late at night or early in the morning with wandering hands ready to heal my body. During the moments pleasing myself I chant quietly, or sometimes just in my head, “Sana me, prima vitae” which is Latin for, “Heal me, Life force.”

The moment right before orgasm I say it as a command, my body begins to slither like a serpent as I am in the throes of passion, I can literally feel the Magick coursing through every cell, molecule and atom. I lay there afterwards thanking my body, loving my body, no need to feel self-conscious about if I performed well, or if my partner enjoyed it, because that partner is me, the only one who matters.

When I wish to use an element of Sexual energy for actual castings, I don’t ever use the orgasm but I have used vaginal secretions for binding, and protective Magick. If you consider urine to be part of this, it is also really, really good for protection, specifically of territory.

I do not menstruate, so I have used urine, and secretions more than others, please feel free to check out the links provided, and to use your menstrual blood to its full potential!

When in need of said secretions, I will set up my ritual space, and masturbate right in the circle, I wipe my Yoni with a (clean) cloth, one usually color associated with whatever form of Magick I am doing, or deity I am working with. I then place the cloth upon my altar, or working space, and voila, I have the element of sexual energy, and the end product without needing a partner.

Sex Magick is a fantastic part of Magick as a whole, and one that is very fulfilling to personal growth and development but the individual often forgets themselves when dealing with this form of the Craft, and that is where emotional instability, dependency on others, and cracks in our foundation begin to occur.

We must take care of home, make sure our home is in order before we invite anyone else over, and our bodies are our homes; they are our temples and we need to treat them as such.

 

Resources for further research:

http://www.luckymojo.com/bodyfluids.html

 

http://www.thefountainoflife.org/womb-awakening/sacred-menstruation/sacred-menstruation-reclaiming-our-wise-blood/

http://www.egreenway.com/wands8/sexmagick.htm

 

 

 

 

Masturbation and Magick: How I Healed Myself Through Touch

Anna O 2

Image: Anna O

“She imagined herself both queen and slave, dominatrix and victim. In her imagination she was making love with men of all skin colors–white, black, yellow–with homosexuals and beggars. She was anyone’s, and anyone could do anything to her. She had one, two, three orgasms, one after another. She imagined everything she had never imagined before, and she gave herself to all that was most base and most pure.”

Paulo Coelho

I hear people talk about Sex Magick all the time, great topic by the way, but when discussions come up it usually involves a partner, or multiple partners, why is no one talking about the most important kind of Sex Magick there is: masturbation.

The topic of masturbation was never discussed when I was a child, partially because my Mom was not sexually free yet, and my Father was a strict Roman Catholic. The whole act, and anything overtly sexual was shamed, actually. I first learned about masturbation because I was sexually abused. It opened my body up to strange, odd sensations but my emotions were being beaten down little by little. At 8 years old I was completely unprepared for everything that was going on, though the encounters only happened a few times, it was enough to cause damage to my Soul, and psyche; it was at that time that my unhealthy relationship with sex began, it became my drug.

When I was being abused, I would shut out the world, I would turn off everything, essentially I was making myself completely numb—it was the high of all highs, and the low of all lows, simultaneously. When the abuse stopped I would masturbate on my own because there was a signal to my brain to shut out the world. It was during this time that I was still living with my estranged Father, and my Brothers, and the peak of my Fathers wrath. (Note: My Father was not the abuser, so let’s not misread this paragraph, k?)

For an Empath like myself I needed an escape. At the time I didn’t understand that I was cleansing and grounding myself through my Root and Sacral Chakras, and the moment of orgasm blasted open my Third Eye and Crown Chakras. I was practicing Magick, a protective, cleansing form of Sex Magick, and didn’t even know it.

I lost my virginity during some dreadful encounter at 18, and once my heart was broken a couple times I became a man-eater; I didn’t care about emotions, or connections, didn’t care about anything really. My experiences in the past with men sexually were all interesting, and amazing in their own way but I chose terrible men, so I took on toxic energy. I used sex as an escape just like I used masturbation as an escape as a kid, also I was young and on some power trip– “I have a pussy, I hold the power” type thing.

It was a royally fucked mind frame, one that I didn’t see the pattern of until I stopped having sex. October 11, 2013 is the last time I had intercourse, or any sexual contact with a partner, and it has taken me all that time to heal the wounds, rid myself of the energy, and make myself whole again.

Now, I take on the world as a complete, self-aware, awakened, sexually empowered Woman, and will choose my partners as such.

I didn’t masturbate for the first year and a half; I was completely turned off sexually. I stopped paying attention to my Sacral chakra after my hysterectomy, how stupid. I just was losing touch with everything that makes me, me. I lost touch with the very Womanly ways that makes me so proud to wear this skin.

My journey to become one with myself started with forgiveness, of myself and every single person in my past who I was still attached to in one way or another; that’s a heavy weight to carry, and forgiveness is such an important lesson, only when one forgives, and let’s go, can new things blossom.

Then it was a battle through lonely, and being alone. We as people often confuse the two, and we need to be comfortable with both in order to appreciate companionship. You see, having a partner can be fucking annoying, you are sacrificing things that make you an individual to become a unit with another person, the whole idea when put into somewhat “Technical terms” sounds so unappealing; when you look at a partnership for what it is though, for what it was meant to be, I think nothing sounds more Divine.

Figuring out the difference between lonely and being alone was the hardest lesson to this day; giving up sex was easy, and for a long, long time even the sexual urges stopped. Even now when I do have a sexual urge it is never, ever based off looks, or raw sexual attraction in that way, it is always based off mental stimulation, in some cases a certain energy they give off, and it is rare indeed.

After these two battles came the most important lesson there was, facing myself on a sexual level. I had plenty of wounds to heal, plenty of sexual demons to face, and in order to move on with my life, I had to face them, head on.

I grabbed my hand mirror one day, took my pants off, sat in the lotus blossom yoga position and stared at my Yoni; I examined her, I talked to her, I touched her, I admitted my fear of her, and her power and I apologized for neglecting her.

Later that night I was in bed listening to my favorite Shiva Mantras, slowly my hand started to glide down my body, and I began to feel sensations I hadn’t felt in so long, goosebumps began to form on my skin, and my nipples became erect the moment I opened my flower up allowing her fragrance to dance in the air; I touched her, loved her and slowly began to remember her. It felt like old friends, old lovers, meeting again. When a sensation would happen that reminded me of my past, I would focus on it more, I would cry, I would hate my abuser, I would hate those men, then I took my power back. I reminded myself that this is my pussy, and I control her now, these are my sensations and I control them now.

I have become a sexually empowered Woman not through my experiences with partners, but through my sexual experiences with myself. I now know what I like, what makes my body move, and moan, no longer holding onto the residual energy of past lovers, and abusers.

I am completely free, my sexual power is mine, my orgasms are mine, that Magick is mine, and it has healed me in ways that cannot be described.

Sacred Sex: BDSM

Bruno Dayan

Image: Bruno Dayan

“It’s hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That’s part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can’t refuse anything and can’t even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”

Cherise Sinclair


I am going to venture into new territory here, and I hope that I do this piece justice, and represent the community in a positive way. My intentions are to evoke thought, and bring about discussion regarding a very taboo topic; I am referring to BDSM.

At this point you are probably wondering why I have taken on this topic, why I have strayed off my usual Occult/Magick/Awakening topics to write about a sexual fetish; all I can say is that it’s passed time for someone to take this head on from a spiritual aspect, and bring forth a new way of thinking. I am not necessarily saying I am that person(s), but man do I hope to be one of them.

It seems that in the last 3 years since the release of E.L James’ “Fifty Shades of Grey” book and movie series that everyone has an opinion without really knowing any truth behind it. I want to clear things up because besides the fact that I am part of this community, people believe that this book series is an accurate portrayal of what it is to be in a consenting Dom/Sub relationship, but also because in recent months my fellow enlightened community seems to think that sex with a bit of kink is no longer Sacred, it is no longer spiritual. I just want to take this time to say that the pairing portrayed in Fifty Shades of Grey is an abusive, possessive relationship, and that is the furthest thing from what BDSM really is.

The truth is, BDSM is the most sacred form of sex you can have, above Tantra, above making love with passion and fire, above fucking; it is in the freedom of trusting your partner so deeply that you are putting your well-being, quite literally, in their hands and trusting them not to hurt you. Once your ability to make decisions for yourself has been taken away, your mind will venture into new territory, you do not have to worry about this position, or that sensation; the Dom controls it all for you.

You will feel sensations you never thought you had before, your mind will be pushed to its absolute limit and beyond, you will find that what is painful is a release and in that release there is pleasure.

You will finally understand what it means to own your Will, to live your Will, to find pleasure in your Will. The line between pain and pleasure is almost non-existent and once you go past a certain point in your mind, in your psyche you will suddenly feel the freedom, ecstasy and a natural high that cannot be compared to anything in this world.

Before I go further, let me define what BDSM is:

“The term BDSM is made from 3 pairs of words:

Bondage and Discipline

Dominance and Submission

Sadism and Masochism

“These words describe a wide collection of activities that fall under the umbrella of BDSM – and cover a whole range of relationships between two or more people, from casual, or one off situations, to more permanent arrangements.”

I personally am into Bondage/Discipline, and Dom/Sub. I am being open about this as a submissive sexual partner but as an Alpha Woman because I want people to understand, I want people to hear a first-hand account, with no filter and no Christian Grey.

There is a common misconception that Women who engage in BDSM have low self-esteem or that we have been abused, are trying to fill a void in ourselves, or that we are actually being abused in the relationship; none of that is true, not in a healthy partnership at least. Do some people wander into the world of kink because of sexual abuse and trying to fill a void? I’m sure, but it’s not the majority.

Even if it was, sometimes it can be very healing to a sexual abuse survivor to hold the control while not having to make any decisions in the moment; I say this because I am a sexual abuse survivor, I don’t know if that has anything to do with my interest in this lifestyle, I don’t know how much it has affected my decisions when it comes to sex, from a psychological stand point alone I know that, yes it plays a role.

BDSM is demonized because so many people don’t understand what they view as such an extreme act, but that is only because they are not willing to let themselves go; they fear the pleasure, the pain, the excitement, the moment right before orgasm and your Dom tells you to stop.

They don’t know any of that, because they are scared.

Am I suggesting that everyone partake in this lifestyle? Absolutely not, but I do believe that society as a whole is oppressed sexually. People are scared of sex, they think of it as an obligation in a relationship, or to have children, there are a million reasons why people have sex, and just as many reasons why people will not liberate themselves in the bedroom.

A sexually liberated Woman is a whore, a slut, she is broken, she is damaged…….those are just a few stereotypes off the top of my head. It is because of this that many Women stray away from having multiple partners, or from telling their partner what they want, what they like and don’t like, it is also why so many Women do not reach orgasm from sex alone.

On the other hand we have the man and if he sleeps with numerous partners he is “being a man” or he is given props by his peers. The Patriarchy and their hypocrisy at its finest.

Equality, people, equality.

Sex is a sacred act, you are literally sharing your life essence with another human being, and while one night stands, and random fucks are fun, they get old, they can potentially drain us, and we are left taking on the weight of our partner’s demons if we are not selective with our choices. Sex is about pleasure, but it is also about connection, about intimacy, about animalistic instincts, and transcending above this physical plane because in that moment we can escape.

I want to say the most important lesson out of this whole piece: THE SUB HAS ALL THE CONTROL, the Dom is merely playing a role to please the Sub, thus pleasing him/her self. In a healthy BDSM relationship there is first, and foremost consent–It is abuse if there is no consent, period.

You have to go over the rules with your partner, what is allowed, what is not allowed, what do you like, what you have tried, what you want to try etc. etc. There is sometimes an actual written contract, and the relationship itself can be romantic, or strictly about the sexual aspect, which in reality is so much more than sex.

You see I am not trying to get people to subject themselves to this lifestyle if they are not comfortable, I am simply trying to get people to own their sexuality, own their pleasure, own their pain.

Trusting someone to the point that you are willing to be bound, punished and pleased, only to be taken care of after by those very same hands is why BDSM is so Sacred. It is a true partnership built on trust, respect and communication.

Since when are those bad qualities to have in a sexual or romantic partnership?

To research the topic:

http://www.whatisbdsm.com/

http://kimdebron.tripod.com/id2.html

Sacred Blood

Larissa Morais

Image: Larissa Morais

“When she bleeds the smells I know change color. There is iron in her soul on those days. She smells like a gun.”

Jeanette Winterson

I promised myself that I would leave this subject alone, and that I would not add my two cents in, but as usual, I have broken that promise to myself. If you have been on social media the last few days then I am sure you have heard of Rupi Kaur, if you do not know her name, then you surely know her picture. She is the woman who posted a picture of herself in bed with a menstrual leak in her pants, and on her sheets. If you are a woman who has had her period, or a woman who is still active in her cycle, then I am sure this is not a new sight to your eyes. If you are unfamiliar with the story, Rupi is working on a photo project, a series of what it is to be a woman in this patriarchal society, she posted this candid image of herself in a vulnerable moment, and posted it to Instagram, and it was removed. This picture has caused a revolution of sorts, and an uproar on all social media platforms. It appears that we are very much split down the middle, and the two groups are those in support of, and those who think it is disgusting. You know what I think is disgusting? That women are the main culprit of this lack of understanding, and I have read thousands of comments over the last two days of Women saying that Miss Kaur should, “show some class”, “keep things private”, “we don’t have to share everything”, and my favorite, “is nothing sacred anymore?” As I rip my hair from my head, I want to scream, “MENSTRUAL BLOOD IS SACRED!!! YOU FUCKING FOOLS!”

I know at this point you are probably wondering why I am writing about this. My answer to that is that I write about injustices that I see, and I stick to no specific topic. I am going to give some Occult history, and actual historical information regarding menstrual blood and the Sacred spot it has held in every civilization. It seems that just like everything else that empowers the Woman, this too, has been swept under the rug. I find it funny that society objectifies the Woman every single day but the very thing that makes us Woman is to be hidden, frowned upon. This used to be a time that the Woman was celebrated.  I think it is time that the Divine Feminine states her claim; They must hear us roar. This was at no time supposed to be a patriarchal society, and I think it is time for a refresher course.

I was 27 when I had my hysterectomy, as I sit here at the young age of 30, I struggle with my “womanliness” almost every day. I see so many Women who have chosen not to have children and jokingly (some seriously) say that they want sterilization, or a hysterectomy; While I understand the thought process behind this, I mean who wants their period if they do not want children, I think this is a rash decision; But, I judge none, and to each their own. I think if a woman chooses that she wants to have these elective surgeries that is her right, but do you know how hard it is to find a doctor who will perform the procedure, if there is no health issue? I mean, do doctors give single men, with no children the same hassle that they give to single women with no children, when the male goes in for a vasectomy? If it were not for my underlying health issues, and I really only had heavy, heavy periods, would I have been denied the hysterectomy? My periods were so bad that I would have to stay in bed for days, I couldn’t work during it, and the flow was so heavy that I ruined more underwear, sheets, and pants than I could ever think to count.

Why am I being so honest you wonder? Because I think that having a period is a beautiful experience, and one that the Goddess herself has blessed humanity with. If it weren’t for our monthly bleeding, humans wouldn’t be able to create. Or does everyone forget about that? We can only love the Woman when she is submissive, and objectified? We cannot love the Woman if her belly is swollen from her period, and there is sacred blood seeping from her vagina? She isn’t sexy then? We can’t talk about those moments? Why? I say fuck it, and embrace who you are. Embrace those cramps, and that blood that stained your favorite pair of underwear, embrace your ability to create IF YOU CHOOSE TO DO SO. Embrace your inner Woman and everything that comes with Her. Embrace the chocolate cravings, mood swings, the late night trips to get tampons, and pads that are the size of your arm, the salt cravings to counteract the sweets, a good cry with a movie, and you guessed it, your Divine Blood.

Do not be ashamed of who you are, especially not on the account of someone else, and their level of comfort on the subject. I am going to give some history on menstrual blood, I will also give a link to an article talking about Rupi and her photo. I hope, if nothing else, this post brings you out of your comfort zone, only then can we see things for how they truly are.

“Women have been associated with the moon for longer than the human being has been human. Unlike early man, Woman could bleed in harmony with the cycles of the Moon, and not be harmed. When Women live together in close proximity, their cycles become coordinated; in natural light they tend to ovulate on or around the full Moon, and bleed on or around the waning or dark Moon. Furthermore, menstrual blood has very Magickal qualities: it attracts some animals and repels others; and it is an excellent fertilizer. Imagine the effect this had upon early man, who bled only with great danger or harm; and who survived on hunting and agriculture.”

“Menstruation is the most regular thing to happen to human beings. Herein lies the genuine power of menstruation, and what it has meant to human history. Menstruation and its connection to the regular movements of the moon, gave us time in large exact measurements and proportion. Without menstruation and the sciences of measurement Women developed from watching first the moon and then the stars, there would be no clocks or watches, no astronomers, no mathematicians or physicists, no astronauts, none of the architecture and engineering which have been born from exact measurement and proportion. We could build a nest, like a bird; but not a pyramid or rectangle or any other regular, geometric shape. Geometry was a gift of menstruation.”

“The oldest word for menstruation means “woman’s friend”. In some cultures, menstruation was originally called “tupua”, a Polynesian word meaning valuable, sacred, wonderful, Magickal; the word/concept “taboo” developed from it.”

“The days of menstruation were set apart from other days. In Babylonia, they were called “sabbatu” from which we get “Sabbat / Sabbath”. Repeated practices that Women developed in order to teach, confirm, and make social the powers of menstruation were called by words derived from “ritu” — at base, rituals and rites mean public menstrual practices.”

“The female genital, source of blood for the Magick of hunting and agriculture, source of keeping track of time, source of counting and measuring, source of geometry and babies and umbilical cords and the knowledge of tying, of connections; of flowering and fruiting and desiring — the female genital was worth-shipped, the female body was held valuable as a source and as a force; held valuable because of the sciences its mind produced and the wealth of culture that followed after.”

“So HOW did we get from “worshiping” and “the Woman’s friend” to “icky curse”? The answer is a long story of power, authority, their abuse, and public relations. One of the most important and astonishing stories on earth concerns the jealousy many men feel toward women — their Magickal menstrual and birthing powers, and the solutions they have developed to deal with this.”

“In cultures throughout the world, there are male practices that involve some kind of genital cuts to imitate a bleeding vagina. For example, even when a male Jew is born circumcised, he must endure a cut because it is necessary that blood actually flow from the genitals. In many aboriginal tribes this involves more severe practices — even the cutting of the underside of the penis — called “subcision”. In some tribes, the older women tell the young girls, “Don’t laugh at the menstruating men.” They know what is going on — and now so do we. In Greek myth, the Greek hero (originally one who was dedicated to the service of the Goddess, “Hera”) Herakles (later Hercules) goes on a journey to steal the Shamaness belt of the Amazon Queen, Hippolyta.”

We are Woman, our blood is Divine.

Read more about Rupi, here:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/03/27/rupi-kaur-period-instagram_n_6954898.html

Read more about menstrual Magick, here:

http://mirrorofisis.freeyellow.com/id51.html