MUSINGS OF A MODERN MYSTIC: The Fat Witch

Fat Witch

Artist: Kyra Wolff

 

“Fat-bashing in all its varied forms–criticism, exclusion, shaming, fat talk, self-deprecation, jokes, gossip, bullying–is one of the last acceptable forms of prejudice. From a very young age, before they can walk away or defend themselves, Women are taught that they are how they look, not what they do or what they know.”

Robyn Silverman

Within the Craft I often see areas where social issues intersect with our community issues, and body shaming is one of the main intersections I see, and cross.

“Isn’t there a Spell for weight loss?”

“Why are Witches always fat girls?”

“Angry Feminists are created because they are FAT and Men don’t want FAT Women, so they turn to Feminism.”

I have not only seen these statements made to others, they’ve been made to me, too.

I faced similar scrutiny when I was skinny which only proves that people will have their opinions regardless.

The number one insult many people resort to when berating or degrading, particularly Women, is to attack their weight; second to that is attacking their looks.

It’s childish.

It’s elementary.

It’s usually baseless.

But, it fucking hurts.

Even the most confident person can be affected by the piercing words and hate of another.

I am not a skinny Woman and have never hid that fact; if you have been reading my stuff since the beginning then you know the health issues I have been through.

The thing that gets me the most when it comes to society and, brace yourselves, I’m going to say it, FAT PEOPLE, is that society attached HUGE (no pun intended) stigmas to weight.

There’s this idea that if someone is fat they are automatically unhealthy; yes, I know the health risks of excess fat on the human body.

BUT, being overweight doesn’t mean the person sits on the couch eating chips and sweets all day long or does not put forth effort to become healthy.

For me, it’s a culmination of having 7 abdominal surgeries in 4 years all due to female health issues: PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome), Endometriosis, Uterine Fibroid, and Cervical Cancer.

The final surgery that pushed my body over the edge was a full hysterectomy at 27.

A hysterectomy is shocking to the system at any age, but at the age of 27 it’s A LOT to handle, and being thrust into menopause is no easy task, either. Menopause comes with its own set of issues, and even though I am on HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) to get back the estrogen my body no longer produces, I am still faced with the reality of menopausal symptoms and potential complications (bone loss, higher risk of heart disease, weight gain, etc.).

When I had the hysterectomy, my body lost its proverbial mind and sent my thyroid out of whack (I have since been diagnosed with Hashimoto’s) and other auto immune diseases started to pop up.

So, yes, while I am not in optimal health, it’s not because I eat unhealthy or do not exercise; it’s because my body has been through SO MUCH TRAUMA.

I have been through so much trauma.

People don’t see the effort, or the health issues when they see me, or others shaped like me, they just see a fat girl (or person).

I keep saying fat people, and fat on purpose; they are used as insults, and we need to start taking some of that power back.

The F word makes everyone uncomfortable, and for that reason alone, it should be shouted from the mountain tops.

Fat.

Fat.

Fat.

All three F words might be too much: Fuck. Feminist. Fat.
*gasp*

Like I said above, the word HURTS when used against us—equally by ourselves, and others; that is why we need to start breaking down some of that negative energy.

I am not in any way condoning a “Fat lifestyle” and by that, I mean not taking care of yourself because of (for example) untreated depression, or other health issues that you refuse to face.

It also means that you are responsible for the food you put in your mouth, and the amount of activity you have throughout your day.

Me? I eat a balanced diet, I watch sugar and carb intake, I practice 2 styles of Yoga, I meditate, I have made water my friend. I hike throughout the spring, summer and fall. I am not pre-diabetic, I do not have high cholesterol, I do not have heart issues, or any major joint stress (Arthritis in my hips is not from the weight, though the excess weight doesn’t help. But, Yoga does!).

I do have, at times, borderline high blood pressure but that’s because I am a ball of anxiety.

I mean, it’s to be expected.

Because ANXIETY.

A foundation of Magick is in the art of loving ourselves, for we are the root of our Power.

How can we love ourselves if we simultaneously hate ourselves? When we hate our bodies? When we allow the opinions of others to be taken on as our truth?

If you are fat and unhappy PUT FORTH THE WORK TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

If you are fat and happy, then live your life!

Again, I’m not suggesting it’s healthy to be fat but it’s a complex, layered issue and one that is between each individual person and their healthcare provider.

Personally, I have put in the effort, and continue to do so, but it’s like I have hit a plateau; my body is the way it is.

Surgery is traumatic.

Illness is traumatic.

The point of this blog is not to grant permission for being fat, or unhealthy, I do not intend to enable anyone, either; it’s to bring forth and start the conversation.

EVERYONE has a story they write and a battle they fight every single day.

What we see on the outside, while an indicator of internal and environmental well-being, is only a fraction of who and what people are.

Don’t be so quick to judge, you might miss out on an amazing Soul because their weight, or other external factors, made you uncomfortable.

Maybe you need that discomfort.

Rantings of a Mad Witch: Bitchcraft

 

Steven Meisel

Image: Steven Meisel

“To me, a witch is a woman that is capable of letting her intuition take hold of her actions, that communes with her environment, that isn’t afraid of facing challenges.”

Paulo Coelho

I like to address hot topic issues within our community and world every chance I get because I think it helps to open a dialogue between opposing sides, or perhaps bring clarity to those who seem a bit clouded.

Today’s topic is going to be about the term “Bitchcraft”, recently in the American Horror Story: Coven season the term gained popularity amongst our own, before that it was being used by muggles to describe a passive aggressive Woman; now it needs to be put back on the shelves, never to be used again.

I am writing this post as a Witch, and Feminist, and I am passed the point of giving a fuck if those words scare you. They simply mean that I strive for equality, nothing more, nothing less, and they mean that I own my power, I claim myself, and no one can take that from me; individual sovereignty is the most amazing possession one can have, and in a “master/slave” world like this, it is one we must die searching for. Makes me think of Nietzsche:

 

“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.”

 

Women (especially the female Witch) have been feared since the beginning, there is no exaggeration in this statement. We find the Goddess completely obliterated from any major historical story being taught today, only to be written off as myth, or dismissed all together. We had the Burning Times, and Salem Witch trials, currently have burning’s, and Women (and Men) being buried alive in certain countries in Africa.

It seems the only thing that scares people more than an empowered Woman, is an empowered Woman who has Magick, and the elements coursing through Her veins. This goes for my Brothers, too, and the Transgender community because when it comes down to it, if we are free and we are a Witch, we become outcasts of society, no matter what gender we may identify with.

So, this term, Bitchcraft, let’s talk about it…

For me personally I find it so offensive, for lack of a better term, because it is making a mockery of Witchcraft; a Sacred path that I hold dear to my heart, and Soul. I do not water down my Craft, and I do not make fun of it—there is nothing funny about it. The term Witchcraft, or Witch used to be enough to sentence one to death, without trial, without evidence, without anything, it was death, and a torturous one at that. In most cases the accused was not even a practicing Witch, it was just a bunch of fear mongering, even still, to try and make this lighthearted or into a joke seems classless. It’s like we are spitting in the faces of our Ancestors.

The term bitch itself is not like the word Cunt, or Whore that were once used as words of power to describe Women, only to be demonized by the Patriarchy; this word is defined as a female dog but has always been used to degrade Women. I see groups trying to take the power of the word back but we never owned that power, and frankly, I don’t want it.

If you wish to engage me in an all-out war all you have to do is call me a bitch, and you will get a verbal assault that you cannot even begin to fathom.

I sometimes find myself calling my own friends bitches, in context it’s usually “bitch, please” or “bitch, bye” and even then it leaves a bad taste in my mouth, I feel like I just did something wrong. Among my generation there is even a term “bad bitch” which is supposed to be the pinnacle of our Womanhood, and we are to strive to be this…(insert awkward silence)….bad bitch.

No, you can have that title–I am a grown Woman, and that title, I have earned.

Another thing is that I see people talk and boast about resting bitch face, I understand that the term gives such an apt visual but it is negative, and no matter how much we try and sugarcoat it, the truth is the truth. I have said in the past I have resting bitch face because I don’t smile, I don’t look inviting, I often have a scowl on my face because I am lost in thought, analyzing the world, my surroundings and the people in, absorbing it, taking it all in; since when is any of that bad?

Like I mentioned a moment ago, the term itself has negative connotations, and I don’t want to own that anymore. My face is my face, my look is my look, why must it be called anything? This is only a recent realization, too. I guess seeing the word associated with my Craft pushed me over the edge, and well, here we are.

A meme crossed my newsfeed of a Woman holding a chunk of hair in front of her ritual tools, looking quite deranged, and it simply said, “Bitchcraft”. I don’t know if I was reading too much into it, but why did she have to look deranged? Why is hexing, or other darker forms of Magick considered bitchcraft?

What exactly is the term bitchcraft, anyways? Well, I did some digging via the wonderful world of Google, and found that term as defined by urban dictionary means: The art of being a bitch.

Again, is this supposed to be something we are proud of? I get it, I do, because sometimes I am proud of my own bitchiness, but this is not our word, it’s the Patriarchy’s and we cannot take that on as our own, in any context. There is too much attached to it, too much negative power; a negative power that cannot be channeled, or transformed, it needs to be left alone.

Cunt.

Whore.

Yes, take those back, own those. Bitch? Let them have that.

I also found meme after ridiculous meme about Bitchcraft being “the art of pissing people off while smiling sweetly”. I even found a book titled, “Bitchcraft: The Book of Lilith” which really made me mad, the Dark Mother is about the empowerment of Women, not the subjugation of us.

We as Women, we as Witches need to take the power, the history, the deities and the culture that have been taken from us, back, and bring them to life again.

The days of the Red Tent, Sacred Sex, High Priestesses, and Mighty Warrior Goddesses never went away, they have been hidden from the world, shunned, called blasphemous, and evil. The Divine Feminine never went anywhere; don’t you see? She has been here the whole time, waiting for Her moment to rise again.

As I see my Sisters, and Brothers being killed in the name of a tyrannical God because they worship the Goddess, practice Magick or own their sexuality I am urged to fight even harder, and speak even louder to make the wrongs, right; no matter how subjective they might be. The conversations need to start, and they are starting today.

No longer will we bow or cower in submission; I am not your bitch, we are not your bitches.

We are the Divine Feminine Rising.

Blessed Are the Witches.