The Great Teacher: Lessons from Water

 

Moore

Image: Ilse Moore

“Always be like a water. Float in the times of pain or dance like waves along the wind which touches its surface.”

Santosh Kalwar

Some days I just want to scream, “I am not as strong as you think I am!”

Or, perhaps I want to scream, “I am stronger than I think I am!”

Regardless of perspective, some days my heaviness, my darkness weighs me down, too.

There are days where my depth is too much for even myself to swim, and I just want to retreat to the shallows where I can lick my wounds, and catch my breath.

The problem with that is, I don’t know how to exist in the shallows of life, love, Magick, any of it; I only know depth.

And, the lessons from water don’t follow my rules, or what I find comfortable.

Water holds no prejudice, it does not ask permission, water just does; water pushes its way through whatever obstacle it encounters with gentle or great force because water always gets what it wants.

It’s on these difficult days when the waves keep coming that people around me seem to need me the most, leaving me alone to struggle, claw and fight my way out of the Abyss after taking on their baggage—because it’s what I do.

It’s what people like myself do.

We seek to understand.

Clawing my way back from the Abyss is not anything new for me, in fact I do it for fun sometimes; yes, you read that right. I think a lot can be learned by plummeting into our psyche, and the collective unconscious—it is only through feeling the suffering first hand can we understand the suffering.

I swear, as the days go by Buddhism makes more and more sense.

Understanding doesn’t mean we no longer experience it; simply means we experience it in diverse ways.

Pain and emotion, like everything else, have levels and evolves with us.

Today is one of those days where the weight of my world is crushing me.

I tried to channel this insanely chaotic energy into housework, cleaning my Sacred Space, yoga and grounding; not even my long shower helped calm the storm, and that always works.

I can’t make new things for the Shop because I don’t want this negativity to go into my work.

I can’t transmute the energy and absorb it yet because I am still trying to understand and heal (a point maybe only other Vamps and/or energy workers will relate to).

Now in a last-ditch effort, I am letting music take me away and turning to words for assistance.

There was a family emergency this morning, on top of it being my late Grandfather’s birthday today; he always comes through the strongest on this day, and the sadness I feel is gut-wrenching. There is still so much regret that surrounds his and my grandmother’s passing. Lessons of their own, I suppose.

Transformation is never easy, evolution is never easy but this, this is next level craziness.

The Cancer New Moon on my Solar Return this year has caused the flood gates to open, and gratitude overflows with those raging waters for the blessings coming my way but it doesn’t make the current any easier to navigate; let alone keep my head above it.

Because with every blessing comes its curse.

There is a Full Moon coming up on July 8th in my rising sign of Capricorn.

You guys know me, you know how much the Moon affects me—I am a triple Cancer for God’s sake.

To make the point of abysmal, watery depths clearer, Neptune is in Retrograde, and a primary ruler of mine.

Saying that I am drowning would be the understatement of all understatements.

But, just like every other time the Abyss has attempted to swallow me whole I become a hurricane, destroy myself and RISE.

To read more about the upcoming ‘Icebreaker’ Full Moon in Capricorn:

http://darkstarastrology.com/full-moon-july-2017/

THE DARK MOTHER: Lessons from Lilith

Drepina 2

Image: Natalia Drepina

“I am the blood of the dragon. I must be strong. I must have fire in my eyes when I face them, not tears.”

George R.R. Martin

As I wrote in a recent blog I have been noticing a trend of the Dark Goddess calling to, and appearing for many people; it seems that as our world has plummeted into times of uncertainty and darkness, so has the collective conscious and unconscious; there to greet us is Mother.

We are in Her domain now.

At first, I was unsure how I felt about the Dark Goddess, in all Her forms, particularly Lilith, becoming trends—more and more I would see articles about firsthand experiences with Her; Witches and Mystics were finally opening up and telling their stories and sharing their lessons learned from the Dark Mother.

Conversely, I also saw a plethora of historical texts that vilify Her making the rounds, as well.

Is it at all shocking that a Woman who chose Her own path, showed strength and fought for individual sovereignty has been dragged through the mud?

Is it surprising that she is so misunderstood, and even those who choose to walk Her path are demonized, too?

What is it about this primordial energy that draws people in? Why are some terrified, and others fascinated? Why are people, especially (most importantly) Women finding resonance with Her?

What IS all the hype about?

Well, to put it bluntly, the world is full of angry Women, and the people who love them.

The days where the patriarchy rules, and Women are treated as second-class citizens are coming to an end; I know that it seems like it’s getting worse, and in some ways, it is—but it must get worse before it can get better.

There must be a catalyst; that catalyst must affect a lot of people so that the Revolution can gain momentum.

And, a Revolution is coming.

The Divine Feminine is taking Her power back.

The Divine Masculine is taking His power back.

We are taking our power back.

Monotheism, and the divisive tactics of “the system” are being destroyed—piece by piece, layer by layer.

So, what is She?

Who is She?

A Sex Goddess?

A Daemon?

A Sacred Whore?

A Monster?

A Mother?

A Succubus?

A Serpent?

She is all of this and so much more.

Lilith is everything that is wild and carnal within us.

She represents uninhibited sexual energy.

She is unapologetic rage.

She is the Womb of the Dragon—the spark of Creation.

She is the epitome of rebellion.

She is both apple and Serpent.

She is the Dark Mother who teaches us tough, hard lessons.

She is the personification of Shadow work.

She is every Woman.

And every Woman is Her.

The more Women and other groups of marginalized people are blatantly beaten into submission, the more power it gives to these Dark Divine Feminine energies, like Lilith.

These are the deities, and energies who refuse to accept oppression of any kind.

They are Dark Goddesses such as Hekate, Kali, Morrigan, Brigid, Hel, Baba Yaga, Aradia, Isis, Persephone, and Ereshkigal; they are rising from their dark abodes and daring us to jump into the Abyss.

Asking us to trust our senses as we navigate our way through darkness, the underworld and the unknown.

They are teaching us to fight, to have a warrior mentality, and to rely solely on Self.

The Dark Divine Feminine lives in all of us—regardless of gender but She is awakening rapidly inside of Women and THAT is the key.

When that Divine spark is ignited inside us, a door opens and there to meet us is our Magick; this is a huge reason why religion and monotheism are dying (I don’t necessarily think religion is the problem, as I have said in the past).

People are sick and tired of being told how to live, love and believe based on words written thousands of years ago that have no real-world application today. I would go so far as to argue that they never had any real-world application to begin with.

Lilith teaches us to submit to no one, to live on our terms, and to be free in our wildness.

She is not for the faint of heart and asks a lot of those who answer Her calls but, it’s worth it.

Every single moment spent in Her darkness is worth it.

Every single drop of blood, sweat, and tears have purpose.

So, if you can’t handle that, then ask yourself what are you doing on this path?

Articles for further study:

http://www.ancient-origins.net/myths-legends/lilith-ancient-demon-dark-deity-or-sex-goddess-005908

http://thegoddesscircle.net/dark-goddess-magick/

Lost in my Thoughts: A Glimpse into the Mind of Madness

Tina Yu

Image: Tina Yu

“Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.”

August Wilson


There has been much on my mind lately, I have been carrying a lot of weight, for an endless amount of reasons. This time of year is always weird and overwhelming for me; the closer we come to October, the thinner the veil, and the more sensitive I seem to be to the outside world. For those who have read my work in the past on Dear Wicked you know that spirits seem to come to me in droves to seek some sort of redemption, or pass to the other side during the month of October, as crazy as it sounds. For some reason, the visits are happening now, as oppose to 3 weeks from now.

This year has definitely been one that many tales in old age will be based on.

Besides the fact that spirits are freely coming into my dreams, and attempting to come into my home, I have been overcome by a deep, soul wrenching sadness. This is a pain unlike anything I have felt before, and it has thrown me and my routine completely off. I am drained beyond measure, and using any, and every back up resource of energy to just keep going.

It was during a conversation with my chosen kin Brother that I learned the pain I am feeling is coming from Syria, and the destruction that is currently happening to all the temples. Just this past week ISIL blew to pieces the Temple of Bel. It was not until my Brother reminded me that this place that is seeing so much bloodshed, so much pain, war and destruction is our motherland, our holy land, a place that we all come from.

For me, I have strong Soul connections to Mesopotamia, and the nightmares of past lives I have been having are almost surely because of what is going on over there currently, in the modern day. I will link you to the full story at the bottom.

The situation begs the question, why are they choosing specific ancient temples to destroy? What are they trying to hide? Who told them to do it?

All rhetorical questions, obviously, because I know the answers, and I hope that you do, too.

So, I have spirits visiting, and there is a terrorist group destroying priceless, ancient artifacts for fun. (Among a wide array of horrific atrocities being committed by them.)

Check.

Then I read an article about sea life, and other animals on the West Coast who are washing ashore, or being observed as being delirious, disoriented and having convulsions. Only two theories here, Fukushima radiation, or the sonic blasts our military does off the coast(s). There is a link for this story as well at the bottom, if you wish to read for yourself.

It seems the world has turned into a shit show, and that says a lot because it has been a shit show for at least 10 years now. What will it take for humanity, as a collective to finally wake up and see all the distractions right before their eyes? We have become nothing but a consumerist society, blinded by fake wars, covering up the real ones, and spewing lies of “Gods and Monsters” (an apt description for the visual I am going for.)

We are supposed to be kept in fear, a fearful herd is a distracted herd.

While on this topic of herds, you know people always call the masses “sheep”, even I used to call the masses sheep. Then I realized, sheep are in a herd for safety, for comfort, they have a well-built social structure that runs effectively, I mean, I think to call the masses sheep, is an insult to sheep.

The stronger the herd, the less likely they are to fall prey to the wolves; humans fall prey to wolves of a different variety every single day, and most walk to slaughter willingly, and blissfully unaware.

I think there is no comparison to the human herd mentality, we as a species have become THAT lost, THAT blinded, THAT fucking stupid.

Our future generation is strong in numbers, and could be an invaluable asset to change the fabric of society but a majority of them are caught up in Instagram likes, and YouTube fame that they can’t be bothered with what Bernie Sanders is doing, or what the GOP wishes to do. They fail to see that not voting in attempt to protest is having the adverse effect of what they wish to achieve; revolution.

You can’t change shit when you surrender, you can’t change shit when you remain silent.

You see? My mind is heavy.

I often wonder when I get like this, semi-manic, completely introverted, lost in my Abyss, if anyone else does this. Does anyone else know the freedom, the reward of allowing yourself to go mad for a bit? To go into the deepest part of your mind in attempts to reach the collective unconscious, but instead you detour off only to reach a grand place where there are endless epiphanies?

Because, if no one else does this, if no one else on this fucking wretched but painfully beautiful planet doesn’t allow themselves to go mad, like this, like me, then what am I fighting for?

What is left TO fight for?

It is in the moments of insanity, that one can gain so much clarity. 

Have people become afraid of their minds? Of themselves? Of what they are capable of?

Have we lost sight of the individual while trying to seek unity?

Any unity we attempt is doomed to fail if the unity is not a group of individuals freely choosing to work together, put aside differences and “get shit done”. Otherwise it is considered forced unity, where the individual is lost; a forced sense of oneness will only lead to resentment, and rebellion (not the good kind).

Break free from your cage, face your demons, and find your truth then jump down the rabbit hole, there is nothing left to lose and everything to gain.

Links:

http://www.aljazeera.com/news/2015/08/isil-blows-part-bel-temple-syria-palmyra-150830195420900.html

http://enenews.com/animals-delirious-disoriented-down-west-coast-displaying-unprecedented-behaviors-experts-isnt-govt-waters-offshore-lacking-like-anchovies-sardines-squid-photos-video

LESSONS IN MAGICK: The Way of the Daemon

Demon

Image: Tiago Arrais

“If I got rid of my demons, I’d lose my angels.”

Tennessee Williams

As always this is my personal experience and I am by no means claiming to be an expert.

I believe in consciousness; God consciousness, Christ consciousness, Divine Light and Violet Flame.

Along with Infernal consciousness, Lightbringer consciousness, Black Flame consciousness, Serpentine Gnosis and the Void.

‘As above, so below’

I know the terminology used in this piece will throw some people off; being that it’s biblical.

But, forget the words Angels and Daemons and just read.

“The one thing I know for certain is that I know nothing”.

I have been dealing with Angels and Daemons for almost 20 years, and they have been both my monsters and saviors.

I was asked about Daemons; what they are like, their personality and such, if they follow a hierarchy etc.

I believe that the point is to try and give folks an understanding of these fierce, Magickal, and mysterious beings.

I share my knowledge because only when people have their questions answered will they begin to seek their own personal truth and the awakening that humanity so desperately needs will take place.

Sometimes we have to create the paradigm shift ourselves.

Sometimes we are the shift.

Daemons have archetypes of themselves throughout time; once you dive into the hierarchy, and history you will find that it’s all the same players just different names.

I have found that how we deal with Daemons and how they respond to us is subjective; they seem to appear in a way we are forced to pay attention, thus why some have the ability to show as either sex, or stay in an androgynous form.

A fallen has the ability to appear in three forms; serpent, Angel or “human”. Daemons usually appear as shadows in corners, or in reflections (mirrors, glass, windows, water, and their favorite, pictures.)

They move very quickly, are very calculating and pay attention to every move you make.

Both races have the ability to come in an ‘incognito mode’ but that just means we can’t “see” them; they are always felt, at least that is my experience.

There is a ‘race’ that is Daemonic, they never had grace flow through them (never were Angels) and then there are the fallen; also known as the Grigori, or the Watchers, the original 200 who fell with Lucifer during the rebellion.

Stories create egregores, it’s paramount to understand that. I may not believe the story, but the energy it created is undeniable.

From what I understand of the text, more than 200 fell with Lucifer; the number is around 3,000 but the 200 “originals” seem to have a different power source, and are ranked higher than the others.

The idea of Daemons existing in Hell before the rebellion has been around for centuries, it was made even more popular in the 18th century with Johannes Wierus and his translation of the Lesser Key of Solomon and the Goetia.

Wierus wrote that Lucifer took 1/3 of the Angels which equaled 2,400; when they arrived there were 11 Princes of Hell who had 6,660,000 Daemons each under their command.

This is important for several reasons.

I am sure you see the ‘666’ also, 2+4=6, and according to Christian numerology the number 11 is known as an ‘unholy Divine’ number, 10 being the Divine because of “it’s round perfection”.

In reality 11 is an awakening number, a master number; no wonder the Christians make it out to be “evil” or “bad”.

I work primarily with Lucifer, Belial, Molloch, Baal (Ba’al which is truly a title meaning Lord) and Jinn (Djinn).

Molloch in my experience is a much more violent form of Baal; think Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

I always have G with me, and I believe that Crowley was correct when he said that the most important moment in our Magickal career is to learn who our guardian Angel is.

Having G around is what allows me to easily access these Divine beings.

In the beginning though I was a victim to them because I did not lay down boundaries, and I allowed them to feed off my fear.

I know when they are around because it will suddenly get overwhelmingly hot, and Lucifer is the hottest of them all.

Similar to the flushed feeling when wearing Moldavite; ironically, said to be a stone that fell from his crown when he fell from grace.

When Lucifer is around there is an overwhelming smell of Sulfur, and at times I can taste it.

Belial smells like cigars and depending on his mood, or the intentions behind the summoning the smell itself can be sweet or absolutely repulsive; like you are living in an ash tray.

Baal is a very powerful energy, and his overwhelming disdain affects how he smells to me, it can only be described as a swamp, or musty— I really cannot put it into words, and with him comes a very depressing energy.

As far as personality goes they all have their own quirks, but the one common denominator that they have is a fantastic, twisted sense of humor.

I find that when Lucifer is around his mood can rub off on me, and at times he has influenced me to stir up some trouble when he was bored. A trickster in some regard.

The Jinn are by far the most temperamental, and if they are not kept busy they will destroy your house.

The higher up in the hierarchy you go, the more they require from you, this also means the importance of drawing boundaries is going to be for your protection.

I do not invoke, I would never invite an outside energy inside myself; I may summon and allow them to have access to this world through my eyes, so to speak, but in no way are they to enter my body, or soul.

Spirits can hurt you as much as they can help. You must know the Daemon you are working with, you must show respect but not consider yourself beneath them, and absolutely not above them.

Equal.

Daemons should not be called to do simple bidding, they do not take kindly to being called for something mundane; make sure you know the price for the task that you have requested.

I suggest when summoning to offer them something. For example, I use incense, candy, wine, cannabis, vaginal secretions, cigars, blood and saliva.

Not everyone should be offering bodily fluids because this can cause an unhealthy bond with the Daemon (or any Spirit).

As for the hierarchy, it is a nobility ranking system and it goes as such: Prince, King, Marquis, Duke, Earl and President.

Each noble member has “minions” or “foot soldiers”, these are lesser Daemons who do the bidding of higher ups.

They are ruthless, and have absolutely no moral compass; nothing to lose, everything to gain.

If you are ever visited by one of these it is best to banish them, and do note that the lesser Daemons once banished, can usually not get back to this plane.

Each Prince is in charge of one of the Cardinal directions: North, South, East, West.

The important members to know are the big three: Lucifer, Belial and Leviathan.

When working with these Daemons they seem to be more diplomatic but this means that they also require more out of you; except Leviathan, she is a beast and will test every limit you have placed on her, and then devour you.

The last question I was asked is, are Daemons the old Pagan God’s.

Yes.

This goes back to the whole archetype, or shadow theory; the idea that Daemons or fallen have created other beings from pieces of themselves.

Examples would be Set, Pan, Hermes, Prometheus, Enki and Cernunnos to name a few, are all said to be versions or shadow selves of Lucifer himself.

Daemons (Daimons) used to be messengers to Yahweh (YVHV, YHWH), and they were given the duty of delivering human prayers, and souls to him.

I believe that Daemons themselves are demonized.

The word Demon is what Christians refer to when speaking of “Evil beings” whereas the spelling Daemon, or Daimon shows respect, and Divinity.

I have worked with all kinds of deities, and energies and the ability to work with Daemons is not something that is just bestowed upon us; it takes time, effort, motivation and concentration because if they sense a weakness, they will feed off it. You will become psychological prey.

If you show them that you are a predator just as they are, they will allow you into their Kingdom and show you the ways of the Ancients.