LESSONS IN MAGICK: The Strength of Sisterhood

 

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“There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.”

Madeleine K. Albright

This month marks 3 years since I started the NR Facebook page, and 2 years since starting this blog and my Shop; to say it’s been a whirlwind would be an absolute understatement.

I started this venture with no goal in mind, no real intention either; I wanted to create a sanctuary for myself, a place that was my own where I could express my opinions and experiences how I saw fit.

At the time, I didn’t know what that looked like, I didn’t know how I was to navigate this new world I found myself in; a world I had created both by choice and circumstance.

It was hard.

It was devastatingly fucking hard.

Still is, most days.

I have no problem being challenged, or having opposing opinions voiced (others would debate this fact); I do have a problem being attacked though.

I have a problem with people who only read and see what THEY want to read and see, and cannot look at anything objectively; furthermore, they cannot admit when they are wrong.

So, instead of admitting they don’t know, or that they are, in fact, incorrect, they lash out.

Their weapon? Vitriol.

Even when I know the person spewing the words is just a troll who’s merely projecting their insecurities onto me, or simpler yet, they are just trying to get a reaction because it gets them off, it still hurts my feelings.

Most people don’t understand how truly sensitive I am—I feel everything, which is why I burn out so frequently.

This brand was birthed into creation by myself; it’s literally like my baby, and when my baby is attacked, it *feels* personal.

Often, I react as such: an angry, volatile, deadly mama bear.

I know and say all the time that my way is not the only way, that my views are not the only ones.

I don’t want followers, I don’t want a herd of people who think like me; I simply want to spark something inside the minds of other’s by showing them what it looks like to burn in the fire of your truth.

I lead by example.

I light myself on fire every day and show my flames and scars to the world.

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I didn’t realize that my flames would act as a calling card of sorts beckoning like-minded individuals to seek me out, and thus, the page grew rapidly.

I also didn’t realize that in showing my scars, pains, and brutal truths to the world, it granted others permission to do the same.

In the beginning I talked mostly about topics of the Occult, demonolatry and such.

As my journey began to change, as I began to change, so did the content, which I believe is genuinely authentic; the page should reflect what I am going through and who I am.

To my surprise my page base became predominantly Women.

Now THIS was unfamiliar territory for me.

Not only did I not have friends growing up because I was so painfully different, bullied at times, accepted at other’s, choosing to keep to myself most often—I didn’t get along with other girls.

I have always known who I was, and at an early age that is threatening to other girls who are still trying to figure themselves out; it’s threatening to some Women even now as an adult.

In a world full of societal dictations about who and what we are all supposed to be, knowing who you are and living that truth are rebellious acts.

I found my inbox filled with messages from Women thanking me for sharing my experiences and telling me theirs; like soldiers comparing war stories, we shared pain, trauma, oppression, abuse, awakenings, metaphorical death and finally, rejoiced in our rebirth.

It was in these intimate moments that a silent Sisterhood was formed and has been forming ever since.

In my blog, The Rise of the Rebellious Woman I credit the Dark Goddesses with the considerable number of Women joining the Revolution, reclaiming their power, truth, and stepping onto the Left-Hand Path to take back individual sovereignty stolen from them and the Women who stood here in times past.

What I failed to see then is that the Dark Goddess works through Women like myself—Torchbearers who in these times of darkness are lighting the world on fire with their words of wisdom, and war cries for rebellion.

 

 

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I stand arm in arm with my Sisters as we begin to understand and accept that we are so much more similar than we are different.

And through sharing our stories we can heal each other, which in turn heals the wounds of the Divine Feminine; for She can only be healed when Women come to know that each other is an ally, not enemy.

When you tear down your Sister, you tear down yourself.

Thank you to all the Women who have reached out to me and continue to do so; in your words I find so much strength, motivation and inspiration.

Thank you for supporting me, for walking this journey with me, for having my back when the world gets me down.

Most importantly, thank you for teaching me the Sacred, Ancient power of Sisterhood.

Together we can conquer Empires.

Together we will dismantle the Patriarchy.

DARKNESS GIVES BIRTH TO LIGHT: A Reminder for these Trumpian Times

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Image: Stefano Corso

 

“Sometimes people hold a core belief that is very strong. When they are presented with evidence that works against that belief, the new evidence cannot be accepted. It would create a feeling that is extremely uncomfortable, called cognitive dissonance. And because it is so important to protect the core belief, they will rationalize, ignore and even deny anything that doesn’t fit in with the core belief.”

Frantz Fanon

The Political game has always been something that fascinated me and often I would find myself in the midst of debates, even at a young age; far before this election year, far before my awakening, far before I could even vote, it was just something always inside of me. I know nobody wants to talk about or read anymore posts regarding the election but bear with me and hopefully I can inspire some of my fellow discouraged rebels.

For a long time, I didn’t really side, or identify, with either party; I considered myself to be, relatively, non-partisan. Like most millennials I felt that I *needed* to think for myself, not be told by “the system” what, who or how I should be. A rebellion our parents once had but seemed to dimmer as they were beaten back into submission.

I know that millennials, particularly the ones younger than myself (I am 32) have a lot of stereotypes associated with them, and maybe there is truth to some of those stereotypes but this generation IS special. Not to get all pseudo-science, crazy on you but look up the Indigo, Crystal and Rainbow children, there are some interesting theories.

We seem to have rebellion in our blood; while it may not express itself well all the time in its delivery, it’s there, in all of us, waiting to be tapped into.

I feel the rebellion now more than ever.

I have recently been called a snowflake, libtard who “needs to go find my safe space” because I am not willing to accept our current Administration. I have been told that I am unpatriotic, and spoiled and that I need to accept “New America”. I have been attacked for being a Feminazi, while also being attacked for my white privilege.

I admit my privilege, I identify as an intersectional Feminist because I GET IT.

I supported the Women’s Marches that happened all over the world but I also know that white Women were marching for very different reasons than Women of Color, and/or Transgender Women. With this, I want to give a shout out to the Black Trans community; a group who face more violence than any other. I see you. I love you. Keep fighting.

White Women (which I am one, in case that needs to be clarified) are seeking equality because we have the privilege to do so; Women of Color are seeking justice because in 2017 they are still considered sub-human—how can they even begin to fight for equality when they are literally killed for having brown skin? If you cannot admit this happens, if you cannot understand our different causes and help our Sisters (all of them) rise with us, then you need to check your own privilege and ask yourself what the fuck is the point of fighting at all? It should be all inclusive, or nothing.

People who voted for Trump said they wanted anti-establishment but his cabinet is shaping out to be a who’s who boys club of elite men who all have shady business dealings, and checkered pasts to boot; men who line their pockets by rebutting science and raping the Earth for resources—some are billionaires for this very reason.

So, tell me, what do these men have in common with me? How do they represent ME? How do they represent YOU?

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Trump Signing Anti-Abortion Bill Surrounded by Men Source: Huff Post

There are no illusions or blinders on me when it comes to my country; I know Her for what she is and the blood on her hands, and in her soil. I love her despite that because I love the people and all their colors who make up this great Nation. You can love your country and want it to move forward, you can love your country while pointing out its ugly parts and past, you can love your country and be against your Government.

“Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official, save exactly to the degree in which he himself stands by the country. It is patriotic to support him insofar as he efficiently serves the country. It is unpatriotic not to oppose him to the exact extent that by inefficiency or otherwise he fails in his duty to stand by the country. In either event, it is unpatriotic not to tell the truth, whether about the president or anyone else.”

Theodore Roosevelt

To be frank, this entire election cycle and the drama that came along with it has made me feel defeated and discouraged; I never had too much faith in democracy in recent years (thought all politicians were bought and paid for) but I had enough trust where I thought, for sure, that a reality star who is an open misogynist, racist, sexist, classist, elitist would not get to sit in the White House.

Yet, here we are. Wishful thinking got me again.

I don’t know if I should laugh, or cry, or fight, or scream….

I don’t know what to feel so I feel it all but I have felt it all for so long that now, right now, I am numb.

I feel like I am waiting for something to happen and I don’t know what it is, or even if it’s good or bad. Terrifying, it’s all fucking terrifying.

I have stepped, dove and jumped into the abyss many times, but the collective has stepped into the abyss now, too, and that is such an unsettling feeling for an Empath, and Mystic like myself.

The entire world is sitting in the dark; take that however you will. This is why us torchbearers are needed now more than ever.

On this note, a friend sent me a quote yesterday that seems fitting:

“What if the darkness is not the darkness of the tomb but the darkness of the womb?”

Valerie Kaur

If this is the case and we are sitting in the womb of Mother, may we all be reborn with eyes open wide and a mind that isn’t blind; may we help Her rise.

We are in a perilous situation right now, and we are all in it together; regardless of what side we are on.

Yesterday I re-shared my blog about how to deal with the current world and being an Empath; tricks to help you cope and deal, but today I am going to focus on the Mystics, the Healers, the Light bringers.

How do we get through this darkness?

DON’T FEED FEAR, DEVOUR KNOWLEDGE: Since we are now living in a world of “alternative facts” telling the truth will become an act of rebellion; speak it, scream it, and shout it as loudly as you can. They can’t silence us all. Shine your light on their lies.

DON’T FEED HATE, SPREAD LOVE: This is a time where unity is more important than ever before but, unity can only happen when we understand that we ARE different. I think that those who state “We are all one race” don’t really understand the pain, struggle, and oppression that is experienced by people of color daily. We must listen to their experiences, and help them heal by speaking their truth with them; showing compassion, and empathy wouldn’t hurt either. Most importantly, we must love each other because it is only love that will make us strong, only love that will pull us out of this. And, y’all know I am not a kumbaya type of person but shit is real right now.

We mustn’t be silenced, or rollover in submission; we must fight back, allow our voices, all our voices, be heard. We must light our torches and shine them so that other’s may see the way.

We must heal the collective and show them that this isn’t the end; darkness is just the beginning.

TORCHBEARERS: It’s Time to Shine Your Light

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Image: Diggie Vitt Photography

 

“Life is filled with unanswered questions, but it is the courage to seek those answers that continues to give meaning to life. You can spend your life wallowing in despair, wondering why you were the one who was led towards the road strewn with pain, or you can be grateful that you are strong enough to survive it.”

J.D Stroube

I think it is safe to say that last year was a year of change, death and destruction (metaphorically and literally) for just about everyone; I know it most certainly was for myself. With these emotions and experiences there comes Shadow work, an inevitable part of our journey; facing the darker nature and emotions of/within ourselves; having to own up to our mistakes, our pain, our “shit” and still look ourselves in the mirror afterwards.

Not an easy task on top of an already complex path.

My darkness, traumas, and inability to conform are what led me to the Left Hand Path, and Magick in general, as well as having a calling deep in my Soul. I thrived in the darkness, and darker shades of gray; I loved to roam in the Shadows of myself, the otherworld and the collective unconscious trying to figure out why the dark appealed to me so much.

I immersed myself in the energy and embrace of the Dark Feminine, and swayed my hips with the Charge of the Dark Goddess; I embraced the wrath of Kali by allowing my own rage to run free, and I walked with Hekate in the Underworld staring death in the face.

I challenged fate, the Gods, and went against everything that was expected of me.

I rebelled, I lashed out, I embraced my wild nature; I raged, I screamed, I cried, and apologized not once.

But, all good things must come to an end.

After going through numerous Dark Nights of the Soul and dredging through Shadow work for over 2 years, observing and absorbing other people’s darkness and embracing my own, I can admit that I have stayed in the dark too long and now, am being forced to become my own light and shine brighter than before.

You see, I let the darkness seduce me; I got lost deep in the Abyss and have been sitting here, stuck, for weeks now—months even, trying to find a way out.

I try to remain positive and keep it all in perspective but lately it has been next to impossible to do; the recent Mercury Retrograde was the hardest one that I can remember. I remain grateful always, and make the choice every day to turn my heart towards the sky but sometimes, it’s just fucking hard to do.

During a tear-filled phone call, earlier today with one of my Sister Witches she posed a question that was so profound it has led me to write this post.

She said, “How do you create and hold space for such deep sadness and despair while still living your day to day life?” Referring the collective and personal pain and sadness that she is feeling currently.

As those words left her mouth the epiphany hit me like a ton of bricks:

“The only way out is through.” -Robert Frost

Frost’s poems have entered my mind time and time again reminding me of the lesson I am to learn or the direction I must follow. Once again, his words sing out to me.

Our society has demonized emotions so much that the majority are completely numb to the ideas of compassion, empathy and, well, love.

How can the Healers of this world cope with such odds? How can the rebels who are here to awaken the masses make them feel something, anything?

How are we, the Healers, supposed to deal with the heavy weight of sadness and fear that is being felt but also hidden?

The first step, we shine some light in the dusty corners of their Soul’s.

We all have aspects of ourselves that are like a junk drawer (not our Shadow but something more human). It’s a drawer we all have in our homes that we prefer a stranger not stumble upon and go through; finding out how sloppy we can be.

Our Soul has that same kind of drawer.

Well, it’s spring cleaning time.

This world is in desperate need of awakened and enlightened people, and I don’t mean those fake gurus who want followers; I mean the real deal who wish to have you walk your path of independence rather than follow the herd—even if that means you walk a path different from their own.

I know, I know, people on the page have tried to defend the herd as being smart; in nature, it is a defense mechanism to keep them safe from predators, a way to keep them warm, and a way to have community.

Sheep and other herd animals don’t have egos though; the Alpha males may battle it out every once in a while, but the hierarchy is set in place, and animals don’t have the awareness to question it.

Humans however, we do. And, that is why following the herd has never fared well for humans.

When we follow the herd, we lose the individuality that makes us all so unique; we lose the ability to form our own opinions because they are fed to us. It is hard to walk alone, it is hard to break free from everything you have ever known but what is the alternative? Follow blindly?

While I feel the Shadow of last year still hanging over us, the fear of the unknown, and the panic because of the uncertainty of our future, I have hope.

Some people call me naïve to keep hope alive and maybe I am; fear is no better than naivety though, but worse.

I walk in to 2017 shedding the darkness and thick skin that 2016 gave to me and step into the fire of revolution and truth.

Most importantly, I step into the fire of hope.

Blessed are the Witches, Wild Mystics, Shamans, Healers, Awakened, Enlightened and Spiritual folks of this planet; it is our torches that will guide us through the darkness.

Blessed are the light-bringers and torchbearers;

Now go light the world on fire.

 

Anger and Rage: The Main Ingredients for Revolution

Tim Walker

Image: Tim Walker

“Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean.”

Maya Angelou

This blog originally was about people being afraid of an angry Woman; I had an entire dialogue mapped out in my head of things I wanted to say but as I sat down to write this I realized that it isn’t just Women who face being misunderstood because of their anger, but there are tons of Men who are in the same boat, too.

After sharing an article the other day about how the world needs angry Women, I knew from the commotion it caused that it was time for me to say my piece.

Before I discuss the commentary, let me digress and tell you about myself and a friend called rage.

People misunderstand this friend of mine and often say she is careless, but I believe that rage, just like anger is necessary. These emotions are my natural state of being but I am not a violent person. You see, we go way back, in fact, rage was probably my first emotion. I came into this world premature, sick and fighting ferociously. I wanted to be here, and my Mom knew that; she said I fought from day one, have been stubborn since day one, and have scowled at the world around me since day one.

Throughout my entire life I was told to soften myself, to not react so quickly, quiet my voice, or not speak my opinion too much; these “rules” and expectations were drilled into my head since I can remember, by everyone around me.

My Capricorn rising, and Taurus moon were not having none of that silence though, and I continued to speak my mind and have my opinions no matter the cost. I didn’t care that people thought I was a bitch, I didn’t care that people mistook my look of thought for a look of judgment, I didn’t care about anything else except for seeking justice for those who couldn’t seek it themselves.

I have always had what I refer to as a Savior Complex, often mentioned in my blogs.

Admittedly, as a naïve young woman I used to want to actually save people from themselves, but that led to a string of unhealthy relationships (both romantic, and platonic) and levels of insanity that cannot be equated. I learned through experience that I can be a guide for those who have lost their footing on their path, but I cannot make them see or do anything; I cannot make them take that leap, I can only lead them to the edge.

I don’t seek fame, or acknowledgement; I don’t want rewards, labels or titles, I simply want to help people be as free in their truth as I am in mine.

The more people willing to burn in their truth, the quicker the fire spreads.

My rage, my beautiful, glorious rage is the fuel that keeps me going and keeps my fire burning strong.

It is the rage and anger that fuel my passion, my creativity and my drive. For so many people rage and anger come from a place of hatred, and THAT is where the main problem lies, and why so many people have this negative view of these emotions that, for me, are the most powerful tools in my arsenal.

When attempting to make your point or state your case the message can be and often is missed by many once anger and rage come into play because they see it as a sign of aggression. Men are considered dickheads or assholes for being angry, and Women are automatically crazy bitches or psychos.

I don’t know why assertion is seen as a bad thing either; without Alphas, the world would be out of balance. Being an Alpha doesn’t automatically make us or give us the freedom (or permission) to be pretentious pricks though.

The main reason people fear anger is because they see a reflection of themselves in those emotions. People are scared of their own anger and rage, so they fear it in others, too; which is one of the main reasons I am writing this.

Anger and rage do not have to be violent, and in many cases when these emotions are being expressed properly, they aren’t violent. The media has over sensationalized anger fueled by hatred so much that we as a collective have forgotten what healthy anger is.

People say that the opposite of love is hate, but I disagree; the opposite of love is anger.

Hate is stemmed from fear and ignorance, while anger can be rooted in these emotions, too, it can be channeled, and it can be productive. Hatred is toxic in every form (primarily to the one holding onto the hate), anger is not. I know many disagree with me and many believe that anger is toxic, and can lead to destruction, but I disagree on that point, too. This is yet another example of people confusing justified anger, and rage with anger stemmed from hate, willful ignorance, and intolerance.

If we want change, if we want a revolution, what are we going to do, spread more hate? Hate is what got us here in the first place.

Spread only love? That won’t stop wars, corruption, systematic oppression of entire groups of people: classism, sexism, racism, etc.

We need the anger to balance the love out. We need the anger to be our sword, and love be our medicine.

We need to show compassion, and spread love, of course, but first we need to get fucking angry!!!

I don’t mean become angry with each other; there is more than enough of that already. We need to get angry at the system–the empire that has molded our society to become what it is.

Yes, people have free will, and the freedom to choose, but some places in this world choice is simply not a factor, and if it is, it is live or die—live or die. Many of you reading my work, and myself included, will not understand what it means to be forced to make that choice every. single. day. These places become a cesspool and breeding ground of hatred.

We can empathize with those who are suffering but the only way we can fight back is to rise up using our own anger and direct it towards those in power. The empire must fall, or we all pay the price. And, if you are unsure of the “Empire” I refer to, then you aren’t paying attention.

A Revolution is coming; rage is going to start the fire, anger is going to kill the hate, and love is going to heal us from it all.

Calling All Enlightened Ones: A Plea to Humanity

Echo Nittolitto

Image: Echo Nittolitto

“Nothing is as painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change.”

Mary Shelley


If I had to sum up this past week into 3 words I would describe it as being revealing, hard and weird.  On top of the week just being strange, I have felt weird, in the most broad, general way. I mean physically my thyroid seems to be off again, and I am counting the days down until my Doctors appointment next week, but this is more than that.

I feel like piece of me is missing, like piece of me is existing somewhere else right now.

I can’t really describe it in any other way than this, but I have been feeling like I am crawling in my skin, completely out of my element here, just on auto pilot. I have been pretty busy, and non-stop for the last two weeks, finally able to slow down the last few days, but I still feel off, and it feels like the more I try to figure this feeling out, the more confused I become.

I have been busy working on the book project, which I am really excited about. I think this group publishing is exactly what I need for my first major publication, also having someone edit my work gives me perspective, and helps my craft; although, she doesn’t need to edit nearly as much as I thought she would.

This last week I even ordered business cards—business freakin’ cards! They are pretty bad ass if I do say so myself. There are times when I am out, and random shit happens; I run into people, or have an opportunity come knocking and it seems easier to just hand them a card, and allow them to do what they will.

I will also use the cards once my shop is up and running as promotion inside the boxes, and such. All I keep thinking is that my cell phone number is on those cards, but what else was I supposed to do? I don’t have an agent, eh, it is what it is. I guess it’s a good thing my phone has a blocking feature.

See, how did I even get there? On that little tangent, my mind is just in a foreign place right now. I cannot focus on a complete thought without a billion other thoughts colliding with it at the same time, and sleeping has become a joke.

Each time that I fall “asleep” I immediately start Astral Projecting; my best friend (who is completely mundane) has started traveling with me. I am perplexed as a Witch, as her friend, just in general as to why she has suddenly become a partner of mine on the Astral. The panic seemed to set in when she told me that some of the places were “scary”. I don’t want anyone to get hurt because of me.

Why am I bringing her with me, why are we having the same dreams, and why is there such darkness?

I could continue on with an endless amount of questions, but that seems to be counter-productive at this point. I can’t handle the questions that have been shouted into the Universe as is.

I have not travelled like this since I was a child, it makes me concerned, but also excited. I am hesitant to open certain pieces of my sight back up, I already think I see too much. I am also nervous about what could possibly be coming, what am I being warned about, or told?

The messages have been everywhere, even in the clouds.

I feel like I am dropping into the Underworld for a long sleep, but it seems more significant than the change of seasons, or spinning of the wheel.

There is something coming.

At 3:33 this morning I was awakened suddenly by knocking, three times on a little table in my room. I sleep with two Himalayan crystal lamps on, so there is a dim orange hue to my bedroom; enough to see pretty clearly. The knocking startled me because it was so loud, I am used to entities coming through that corner and they know the rule is to knock, but three *loud* knocks that jolted my fucking soul made me take note, and have had me on edge ever since.

I felt a comfort in the discomfort, if that makes any sense. As my cats went scurrying I tried to get a feel, or catch a glimpse of what, or who had entered, but they moved too fast; faster than anything I have ever encountered. I can feel a rage, a fiery anger pulsating from their energy trail, and the air tastes of a sweet cigar.

On top of this there has been numerous Kali references, not only articles but pictures, dreams, just everything seems to be about Her. It seems even my Pinterest account has become hacked by the Universe, and there are signs all over there, too.

I am writing, rambling, like this because it has been too long since I said something, but also because I want to know if anyone else has been experiencing this? From my own observations on Fb, the consensus seems to be that things have been “weird”.

2015 has been pretty gnarly when it comes to cosmic energy, this month being particularly hard, but this is deeper.

We are at a breaking point, and the only way to get through this is to destroy ourselves.

We have to destroy that which no longer serve its purpose, this goes for people, relationships, and material possessions, too.

Our planet, our people, are dying: we are dying.

People have become so concerned with themselves, money, and “internet fame” that we have lost track of community, blessings, and humility. It’s like I live here with a bunch of narcissistic pricks who love the sound of their own voice so much that they can’t hear the cries of their fellow human, or animal for that matter.

All of our advances in technology, scientific and medical, and we choose to poison our people through medicine, and vaccines labeled “good for us” or “necessity”. Even our food has become more “food like” than actually nutritious.

We have shown our true colors as a species via the internet. I mean when twerking videos get more views than political debates, or revolution efforts aka the truth movement, it says so much about our society.

We are lied to and poisoned by TV, digital and social media all the time, too. Please do not think that this is only environmental in the sense that it is our food, or medication, no it’s everything.

We have been warned of the consequences of our actions on this planet, both to the Earth itself, and her inhabitants but not enough have acknowledged these warnings. It is clear that the few awakened ones, and our efforts to awaken the masses have failed, miserably. Now, it seems that we are on the brink of disaster, destruction, all in the name of mass awakening because clearly, thus far, nothing has worked.

The murders, systematic racism, inequality of the sexes, the disastrous state of our justice and political systems, all the way down to the endangerment, extinction of animals at a rapid rate, global warming, and war seem to not be enough for people to “get it”.

Maybe when the Divine has had its say and the destruction has hit home, and it’s immeasurable, people will finally wake up from their coma, but right now, right this very second, we are on a collision course with destiny, and I’m not sure if the human race is ready for what destiny has to say.

Wake up, humanity, before it gets too dark.