The Magician is our first step in the journey of the tarot. He is the all-powerful wizard who understands that nothing can be manifested that doesn’t include all four elements: earth, air, fire, and water.
The Magician speaks of “as above, so below” and we see this represented in the Rider Waite- Colman Smith deck as he stands with his wand pointed to the sky and his other hand pointed down to the earth.
The Magician surrounds himself with the tools of his trade and his table is laid out in preparation for his next ritual. What magic is he about to conjure?’’
At first glance, the Magician may appear to be irrelevant to those of us who live with Depression, but take a closer look and we can see that the Magician has a great lesson to teach us.
The phrase of “as above, so below”, is often followed by “as within, so without.” The lesson of the Magician is simple. To obtain the outer world we want to have, we need to fill our inner world with the things we want.
Let me put it another way. If we want to live a life without the demon Depression on our backs, we have to create an inner life that is in tune with that.
Easier said than done, though, isn’t it?
That doesn’t mean it’s impossible.
Now, we can go the affirmations route but personally, I’ve never been a fan of the “fake it until you make it” theory. To me, telling myself something I don’t believe is completely pointless.
Sometimes, starting the affirmation with “I believe I am becoming…” can work, but only if you believe it’s possible and when you have Depression, it’s very hard to believe that anything rather than despair is possible.
To me, it makes more sense to aim for something that I believe is possible for me to achieve. Once I do that, I can set my next goal, and on it goes. The Magician can help us do that.
The Magician reminds us of what’s possible. And when you’re struggling with Depression, you need to be reminded of what’s possible.
Let’s see what the Magician has to tell us.
- Sit, or lie down comfortably, close your eyes, and take a deep breath. And another. And another one.
- Imagine yourself standing in front of a wooden gate. You open the gate and walk through
- Take notice of what’s going on around you as you walk. What can you hear? What can you smell? What can you see? Is it a sunny day? Cloudy? Night or day?
- As you continue your walk, you can see a tall, robed, figure standing off in the distance, behind a table set with a tablecloth and a number of items.
- As you approach the figure, he winks at you and beckons you forward so that you can see what he has on his table.
- The Magician asks you to choose an item to take back with you.
- You take an offering from the table.
- What is it? What color is it? What shape? What size? What’s it for? How does it make you feel? What’s it’s magick?
- When you’re ready, you thank the Magician and walk back down the path you came.
- When you reach the gate, take three deep breaths and then walk through.
Take out your journal and write down all the events of your walk and meeting with the Magician. Be as descriptive and detailed as possible.
Take another look at your gift. What about it reminds you of your Depression? What about it reminds you of something or someone that you love? What about your gift gives you hope?
Try not to give these questions too much thought, just go with the first answer that enters your mind. That’s where you’ll find your “as within.” At the end of this exercise, you’ll have an aspect of Depression that you can work on healing from, and a person, activity, or thing that you can reconnect with to bring you even a tiny amount of pleasure. You’ll also have something to hope for.
Come back to this exercise as many times as you feel the need to and if you’re really struggling with it, leave me a comment and I’ll try to help.
Tarot Deck used is the Dark Wood Tarot by Sasha Graham and Abigail Larsen.
Fiona Tate, AKA the Depression Muse, is a Lilithian Witch, Writer, and Mental Health Mentor. She helps people with Depression use it as a superpower and turn it into a Creature of Fucking beauty. She’s on a mission to reduce the global suicide rate to zero. Follow this link to receive a free copy of her book Depression Sucks and join the waitlist to hear more about Black Orchid Alchemy: The alternative way to manage Depression.